I cant say i feel better, but i had my peace with God and woke up forgiving myself. I know ill be okay one day. Ill never forget what happened. The evenrs of that day are forever in my mind. My Ghost is gone and i can't bring him back. Honestly reading these stories on this site has made me feel so much better. I am NOT ALONE in this and that makes me so sad for the babies who died but i know how i feel is not odd nor am i a monster. Ive come to grips with the fact it was a terrible accident. One easily avoidable but unforgetable never the less. I hope i have the strenght to share my story one day and save another life. Shame has set in and i will never fully forgive myself. It hurts so bad, but i must accept it. I pray God walks me through this. And i hope my story helps someone else like your stories have helped me. What a wonderful site this is - we are not alone.
To my Ghost. You were the best friend i could ever ask for. We spent 3 great years together and i hope you enjoyed my company as much as i did yours. I wish i could have saved you. You are forever my baby. Until the next life, my sweet boy.