Search the Community

Yesterday was a busy day for me. It was my day off and I had a whole house to clean. I have 3 children under the age of 5 and my brain is in shatters all the time. I was cleaning my bathroom and i needed to do the laundry in there. I opened up my dryer, threw the few items in there on top of it, and went to get the clothes from the bathroom. I put the dirty clothes on the floor and then threw the clothes from the washer into the dryer. I left the door open and went to grab a few more items i could fit and started the washer. Then i started the dryer. A few towels i threw on top were dangling down so i opened the dryer up again and fixed it then went about cleaning. 20 minutes later i started sweeping my living room (about 15 feet from my dryer) and i thought i heard a meow. I have 5 cats so i always think i hear meowing. I stopped for a second and listened. I didnt hear anything and started cleaning again. Then my mom went to pull towles out of the dryer to help and she started screaming for me. I rushed over and she couldnt speak but on the door of the dryer i saw blood. I checked all around and my 3 kids were fine and i could not figure out where the blood was coming from. Finally she said "cat" and i knew. I looked inside and found my Ghost who i rescued from the pound 3 years ago dead and wrapped in the laundry. I pulled him out and he was stiff and i lost it. After a while of me sobbing and saying im so sorry to my baby my husband came home and took him. I watched my mom take out the laundry and there was blood all over it. She tried to clean it but i cant use it. I cant get the site of my baby out of my mind. I didnt hear any thuds in the dryer and when i opened it he didnt crawl out. I saw him a few minutes before i threw the clothes in playing with my other cat near the dryer. I feel so guilty. I know it was an accident but i did this. I was so careless and scatter brained and i should have paid more attention. I killed my baby and i never even knew he was missing. I dont know what to do or where to go from here. How can i move on when i killed him? He was my baby. I thought i saved him from the pound but i just brought him here to be murdered. I saw a few other posts with similar stories. Please someone tell me where to go and what i can do. Im so lost. Im so so sorry Ghost. I never wanted to hurt you. You are the best cat i could ever ask for. I will miss you so, so much. Please forgive me.