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I lost my dad a couple of days ago. I can't believe he's gone, I cannot accept it when i look at his face in the coffin, I wished so bad that he would wake up right now. He left us so suddenly and so soon. I wish i was a better daughter to him, I am just riddled with guilt and regret. I wish I could hold him one more time, I wish I could kiss him one last time, I wish I could tell him how much I love him and need him. That he cannot go and I need him. I wished i spent more time knowing my dad the year before, we drifted apart because he was into a sect/cult and i did not approve of his beliefs and we grew distant. I was angry with him. But i regret it so much, I wish I could undo it all and give him all my love. But I cannot do it anymore and he cannot hear me anymore. I am so consumed by my guilt and loss . I feel like I took my dad for granted that he would always be around for me to mend my mistakes. The months prior to his death he had a stroke and he was recovering, we connected little more but i felt i didn't do enough. Then he had a second stroke, I was away on a trip but I flew right back to see him, by then he wasn't really conscious or aware because of the impact on the brain. The last 2 weeks he was tied down on his bed because he kept trying to escape and scratching himself. I felt like he let go because he couldn't take how his life has turn out to be in the last two months. I feel guilty that i allowed that to happen, I felt guilty I didn't encourage him enough. I was listening to the song "The Scientist" by coldplay and I wish I could go back to the start. Please, someone tell me what can i do.