Partner has left after his mother died

[Megk94+]

So my other half lost his mother on the 1st of December just gone, and for the first three weeks seemed to be coping really well. However, the week of Christmas got too much and after a row on boxing day he left for a few hours, came back late at night and told me he thought he was having a breakdown, wasn't sure if whether or not he wanted to be with me and doesn't know anything right now, I gave him space as he didn't seem to want me around him and my mum had our 2 year old while I stayed at a friend's. The next day he said he needed some space away from the relationship, packed his things and left. It's been 5 days and during this time he has picked our son up and took him out for the day, when he dropped him off he said he's going to the doctors to be referred for help, that he's sorry for what he's putting me and our relationship through because he just doesn't know what he wants right now. Ive let him know that he can take as long as he needs and I'll still be here for him and that i love him but im just leaving him alone basically. I'm trying to be as normal as possible but inside I'm struggling to come to terms with the fact that he might end our relationship, my 2 year old also keeps telling me he's lost his daddy and his daddy has gone and I've tried to explain that daddy loves him and is coming to take him on a day out tomorrow and daddy's just at his friends but I know he knows something not right, I just want to tell my partner how much he's affecting our son but I know that's the last thing he needs right now. Has anyone gone through this? Should I mention how our son is coping? Will he ever come back? 

[kayc]

I hope you will take the time to read the posts in Loss of Love section, there are many many stories similar to yours, mine being one of them.  Yours is compounded because you have a child together.  
I can't say what will happen, the other posts do not have a child, but I would certainly hope he would come to his senses for his child's sake.  Many grievers leave their partners but not usually if they're married and not usually if they have a child.
Since it is affecting the child, I would do my best to console the child that this has to do with his daddy's grief (explain in terms he can understand) and his daddy loves him and always will.  I think I would mention it to his dad because when we're parents we're not afforded the luxury of it being all about us, from the time we have a child our first consideration must be them.  That doesn't mean that's always how it plays out though, it's going to take time to see what he does, the responsibility and onus is on him to seek professional help for his grief.  It's very common for them to need some time and space to grieve and it's hard for them to see anything else but their own grief.

I'm very sorry you're going through this, I can imagine your concern and worry.  Try to focus on you and your child right now and do your best to get some rest.