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Searra Peters

Lossing my big brother to suicide

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My brother has always been my protector he always stood up for me even if I was wrong. He always made me feel like I was safe and losing this has been the hardest part. I recently lost my brother to suicide on June 23rd 2017 he was 29 His services were on his 30th birthday. I was living with him the time of the suicide. I woke up like any other day I woke my boyfriend up as well my boyfriend had said something about going to check on him and I froze I couldn't go check on him. (I still have no idea why I couldn't move to go check on him). Long story short my boyfriend found him and was unable to get in the room. We called 911 and delt with the entire process unable to leave with all the police/medics and go on in the home. Less than a month after I lost my favorite aunt to suicide as well. This has been the longest and hardest summer of my entire life. I guess I don't have any questions it's more of what steps do I make to go forward. Will my emptiness ever go away. Any input is appreciated. 

Edited by Searra Peters

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MartyT   
38 minutes ago, Searra Peters said:

I don't have any questions it's more of what steps do I make to go forward. Will my emptiness ever go away.

I am so very sorry for the challenges these traumatic deaths have placed in your path, but I hope it helps to know that we are here for you, and as a survivor of suicide loss, you have lots of additional support available to you.

The empty spaces that once were occupied by the physical presence of your brother and your favorite aunt will never go away, my dear ~ but the love you have for them will live forever in your heart, just as long as you keep your memories of them alive. Death ends a life, but it does not end the relationship we have with our loved ones.

You've asked what steps to take as you go forward, and this article (along with the links listed at the base) is a good place for you to begin: Grief Support for Survivors of Suicide Loss 

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kayc   

I am so sorry, to go through this not once but twice.  My heart goes out to you in your loss.

Here's another link I hope will be of help to you...

 

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