My Sweet Granddoggy, Skye

[kayc]

Yesterday I went to my DIL's bdy celebration and learned that my granddoggy, Skye, will have to be put down within the next couple of weeks. We've known for a long time that this day was coming but it doesn't make it any easier. I love that dog so much, as much as any dog I've ever had. He's lived with me half the time my son has had him, and I've doggysat him many many times. He has a neurological disorder, among other things, and it makes him unable to walk. For a couple of years he has limped along, getting progressively worse. Recently he began having to push off with his head to get up. His feet splay out and the "walker" my son made him, he never was able to put to good use, he just keeps getting worse. They've been pulling him in the wagon or carrying him. He's incontinent the last two years as well. My son and I had this talk a few months ago about how you know when it's time...I told him when Skye no longer has quality of life or he's hurting. You don't put an animal down just because they're incontinent or inconvenient, you give them the same consideration you would anyone, but out of kindness to them, if they start having pain or aren't happy, then it's time. Lately he's started whimpering. It's time. It is so hard for us. My DIL's mother said you can't keep an animal alive for YOU, you have to do the kindest thing for THEM, and she's right.

There never has been and never will be another dog like Skye. He didn't have an excess in the brain department, but he was the happiest, sweetest dog I've ever met. We didn't get him until he was three, and figure he's about 9 1/2 now, unless they were off in their calculations. By rights he should have gotten at least 12 years, but we all know that's just a rule of thumb, there's no guarantees.

My son is coming in 1 1/2 weeks and doesn't know if Skye will still be with us at that time.

The attached pictures were taken at the beginning of his disorder. His feet splay out now, no longer holding him up, but he still has the happy look.

As hard as it is for him to get up, when he saw his grandma (me) yesterday, he got excited and tried to get up and make his way to me. He sure melts this grandma's heart. I laid down beside him on the grass and rubbed his ears, he loves that. He knows I love him, and I told him Lucky will be waiting for him and he'll be okay.

[enna]

Oh my dear Kay,

This is such sad news. I know how very much you love Skye and I'm so sorry. The pictures are precious. Isn't it just amazing how very attached to an animal we can get. You are in my thoughts.

Anne

[mfh]

Dear Kay

I saw your email on my cell and my gut told me to read it...I am so very sorry about Skye. First he is a beautiful dog and I do understand losing our pets, believe me. When our last Golden had to be put down it was my first time to do that and I asked my girlfriend, who was Buffy's vet, how I would know if the time was right. She said, "Mary, you will just know." It sounds like you all do "just know". I am so sorry. If I can help in anyway...listen or whatever, Kay. I am here. I will be thinking of you and carrying you, your son and wife and Skye et al in my heart.

Peace and love

Mary

[MartyT]

My dear Kay, I feel as if your precious Skye is a member of our HOV family just as much as the rest of us are, and I'm so very sorry to learn this sad news. I know how much you love him, and I know what a wonderful life you've all provided for him. You are so accepting of others' disabilities and imperfections, and Skye is blessed to have you as his grandmother. This is a sad and difficult time for all of you, but I know you will make the most of the time you have left together, and that Skye's passing will be as peaceful and as beautiful as you can make it. Please know that I am thinking of you and holding you close in my heart. I am so sorry . . .

[kayc]

I don't know if I'll see him again, that's why I said my goodbyes yesterday...a part of me secretly hopes they'll put it off a couple of weeks because I'll be on vacation and my son is coming over, but I'll understand if they can't wait. Skye is, after all, the most important thing. I was really looking forward to taking a week off and spending time with my granddoggies...

They live over two hours away from me so they probably won't be calling me to the vet with them...my son is going to have a hard time. I'm glad he has his wife to be by his side as he has been for me over the years when we've lost pets.

Skye has the most beautiful eyes...it's not only how they look but you can see into his soul with them, they are so thoughtful and gentle. He has a very soft gentle stare. All who meet him fall in love with him, unlike Arlie who gets blackballed from vets. They are indeed all so precious...

Here's a couple of pictures of him this week...you can see he's gone downhill....

[annie2132013]

You have been so kind to many on this thread, including me, and I thank you for that !!

Losing a dog who is much loved is very hard. It is 6 months since I lost my dog, and I still cry, and am unsure if I will get another.

I will you strength for your son and daughter-in-law as well as for you, since the near future will be very hard. We have them for such a short time compared to our lives, but they give us so much. My best to you.

[feralfae]

Dear Kay,

I am so sorry to hear about Skye.

You have shared so much about him that I feel he is "one of us" here, along with Arlie.

He is just adorable, and such a sweetie was lucky to find a good family, and the family was lucky to get another member that fit right in to the bunch. I am sorry that he is now in pain.

I am sorry for this loss for your family. I hope you can be together to support and comfort each other. I am glad your son will be home on vacation.

Blessings,

*<twinkles>*

fae

[Wifflesnook]

Dear Kay

I am so very sorry too hear about Skye. He sounds to be a lovely lovely dog. Jan

[KATPILOT]

Kay, I want to say that I am so sorry about the news. My thoughts are with you though there is little I can say.

[kayc]

My son and DIL brought Skye over late Thurs. night and left on their camping trip the following morning; I am caring for Skye right now. In just 1 1/2 weeks since I'd seen him last, I was blown away by how much he'd gone downhill. There is no doubt in my mind that it is time to let him go but that is a decision for my son. I will, however, talk to him about it again. Poor Skyedoggy, he lays down and doesn't move, doesn't lift his head, doesn't smile, doesn't greet me anymore. If I pick him up to carry him outside to pee, he cries. There is no "quality of life" anymore, and I don't want to see him suffering for our selfish desire to hold onto him. He is the sweetest dog in the world, he deserves better than that. There IS no "good time" to let go, no time that we want to say goodbye, it is hard, the hardest thing in the world, no matter when it is. When that time comes, we are going to be inconsolable, but meanwhile, my heart hurts for him. I wish there was something I could do to make him happy or brighten his day. I gave him a tiny bite of bacon, he liked it. I lay on the floor with him and rub his ears, he's always loved that, he doesn't acknowledge it anymore. Poor Skye. My son and DIL won't be back until Tues. or Wed. I hope it's soon that they let him go.

[MartyT]

Oh Kay. I am so sorry. So, so sorry. For Skye's sake and for your son, it is good to know that you are there for both of them. ♥

[enna]

I am so sorry that your Skye is failing. There are no words to comfort. We love our animals like family and I wish there were words to console you but there just aren't. Anne

[kayc]

Yesterday I had a bit of an uplift. I took Arlie for his walk at 4, since it was inbetween rains, and when I got back, Skye had gotten out three paperwads...not tore them up, but they were placed on the floor. You see, I keep a box full of wadded up newspapers for him to get out and shred when he feels upset, when his dad is gone or he's unhappy about something. It's a way of voicing his feelings. In years past, he could make quite a mess with it, but it doesn't hurt anything and is easy to pick up and throw in the fireplace. He didn't have the energy to shred it, but he did place three on the floor. I had to smile at that. So I went to him and asked him if he wanted to go for a walk. He didn't get excited like he normally would, not having the energy or wherewithall to express himself that way, but I could tell he wanted to. So I picked up his harness and let him use his back legs, while I carried the bulk of his weight, and walked him up the driveway, stopping to let him rest now and then. He peed at the top and then we went down the next driveway (I have a wishbone shaped driveway so there's two entrances). I knew he wanted to continue down the street but I also knew that was beyond him, so I told him he could walk all he wanted in his next life and wouldn't feel any pain. He made it down the driveway and I got him into the house. A while later, he mustered the strength to come to me, stand for a moment, and smile at me. I love that dog. I know he's on his last leg, so to speak, but I will love him with my last breath.

[MartyT]

You are the perfect one to offer hospice care for Skye, dear Kae. What an angel you are. Sending love and blessings to you both ♥

[enna]

This just brings tears to my eyes. Please know that we are right here for you. Keep us updated, Kay. I am so sorry that you are going through this right now. When do the kids get back from camping?

[kayc]

They said Tues. or Wed. He's been crying today, not steadily but every now and then. It breaks my heart. He managed to stand and smile at one point. He's worn out now and sleeping.

[MartyT]

Kay, my dear, I know this is your son's decision and I understand that you cannot make it for him. I also understand completely your hope that Skye will die a natural death so this decision will not have to be made at all, and it won't be resting upon your son's shoulders. You are such a good and loving mom and grandmom to take on all of this hospice care, for both your son and for Skye.

I've always found this beautiful piece by my dear friend and fellow animal lover Rita Reynolds to be helpful at times like this. You're welcome to print it out and share it with your son, if you think he'd be open to reading it: Euthanasia: The Merciful Release

My heart is hurting for all of you. ♥

[Queeniemary]

Kay, reading about Skye just broke my heart. Our old rescue dog, Sheba, got to the point where she could barely walk, and Mike would carry her outside to do her business. We had her on expensive arthritis medicine, but it did not make much of a difference. Mike had such a hard time letting go of any animal. She was one of the three dogs, along with the corgi girls that were lying around Mike when my daughter found him on the afternoon of the day he died. The little corgi dogs went outside when Sandy let them out, but Sheba would not leave his side, and Sandy could not lift her. When her husband came he carried Sheba outside. The next day, two close friends and our vet came to the house and Sheba went to be with Mike. I could not care for her, in my physical condition at the time, and even with knee healed would not have been able to carry her, she weighed about 80 pounds. It was the right thing to do, but it haunted me for months. Like I had failed Mike by failing to keep Sheba alive. BUT it is important to know there is a time when you just have to let them go.

My thoughts and prayers with you and Skye

Mary (Queeniemary) in Arkansas

[kayc]

I totally agree that there is a time to let them go. It is not my decision to make but I have already talked with my son about this and will again this week. I love Skye as much as he does, if possible, so this conclusion is not drawn easily, but I feel we need to do what is best for Skye, not for ourselves. By the same token, I applaud that he has not done the "convenient thing" and has continued to lovingly care for Skye, engineering and building a "walker" for him...it was custom built because the ones you find are for dogs with bum back legs and Skye's problem is his front ones, which is much more complicated. Skye has a rectal tumor and the vet said the neurological problems would get him first...but Skye has lived much longer than they thought he would. Mary, I don't think you're a failure at all! If Arlie were to develop the problems Skye has, I would have to have him put to sleep much sooner as there is no way I could carry him, weighing in at 117, when I am little and aged! I commend my son for carrying Skye, for getting him a wagon to enable him to go on "family walks", for selflessly cleaning up countless messes in the house without a word. I think Skye HAS lived this long because of the love and care he has received. But it's time. It's always hard to say goodbye. It's always hard to reach that finality. It's hard because you know you can't undo it and the next day you won't be able to lie on the ground next to him and stroke his ears. It is just the hardest thing in the world. And a part of you feels you are depriving them of life. The "what ifs" that come...what if I didn't do the right thing? What if the occasional smile he had or the wagon ride he went on really was enough? It's so hard to decide for someone else.

[kayc]

My precious granddoggy, Skye, left this world today. His Mommy and Daddy had to let him go just a few minutes ago. They'd gone to Costco and when they came out he was bleeding rectally, and they took him to the vet. They knew it was time. They've known that a while, but it's so hard to do that final farewell. You keep thinking maybe you can get one more day, but they didn't want him to suffer. I'm so glad I had a week with him where I could devote my time and attention to him. I will always love him, I love him as much as I've ever loved any dog, including my own. He was a genuine sweetheart. God, send George over to heaven's gates to meet Skye and welcome him until that day we can join with them.

[mfh]

Oh, Kay, I am so very sorry. My cell just rang indicating email and I saw your message about Skye. I wish I was there so we could share tears. I am so glad you had that week with your fur baby...it was such a gift. Please pass my thoughts on to your son and daughter in law. I am sorry.

With my love

Mary

[enna]

I just read this on FB, Kay. I am so, so sorry. I am sure that George and Skye have already met. I am also so glad that you had that time with Skye. My thoughts are with you today. Anne

[MartyT]

My dear Kay, I just read your message about Skye. You know, I am sure, that my heart hurts with you. Such a beautiful grandmommy you were to this precious soul. May he rest in eternal peace, until the day you cross the Rainbow Bridge to meet him. I know he will be there on the other side of that bridge, with George and all your loved ones who are waiting there for you. ♥

[Leftover]

I am so sorry to hear of your loss. I wish there was something I could say that would help.

[kayc]

He had a tumor that burst, I'll spare you the rest of the details, but he smiled clear up to the end. We buried him in my back yard, underneath the vine maple and he has a cross there and Paul's going to put some stones there. It was a place he liked to lay because it was shady, so that's his final resting place.

Just knowing there are others that understand and care means a lot.