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Learning About Suicide Loss


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Thanks Kay and Lattiee, people can be so ignorant. She's this gypsy-type and she's awkward as can be. I haven't told her anything yet, but I did warn the other survivor-mom here at work because they will soon be working side by side for a few weeks. I didn't want her as shocked as I was. This really put her on guard and changed her opinion of the gypsy quickly. So I'm doubting myself now, but hey - she said it with a giggle - to me. And yes, she is fully aware of why she shouldn't have.

I find lots of reasons to be offended on some days, other days I don't. I know that I'm not on the lookout for it, but it happens. I do find that I'm best served by staying away from children and teens completely. Now I'm adding idiots to that list.

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It sounds like something's wrong with her if she's aware, and still says such, and with a giggle no less! I'd be guarded with her.

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I'm the network administrator here at work, yes, I'm the nerdy IT girl. So I get called upon frequently, and I have to go to her desk at least once daily. She loves seeing me. I should have said something on the spot - now it's too late really - I think - and I have to just guard myself. I'm not flattered that she likes me as I should be. gypsies....

I did make a new friend! We went to painting with a twist together last night. So I'm inching my way back up.. I have 3 new friends. I have hundreds that have fallen away, and some really close ones that I am no longer speaking to on purpose now, but I'm focusing on my new friends now and it feels really good. They are comfortable with my grief and have shared their own with me. It's a new normal, but I'm getting closer to being ok with that.

It will be 6 months that Matthew left us this Sunday. I am having a mass said for him and will attempt to attend it. I have been going to quickie weekday masses for months now because they lack families and singing. It's just easier and I got the ok from my priest, so this Sunday will be challenging. I know. Being an anniversary, and being there with all of the families and singing. So wish me luck getting up my nerves to attend.

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We wish you love and luck whatever you decide to do this Sunday, Cindy, and we'll be thinking of you on your special day of remembrance. Clearly you're already doing your very best, and I've a feeling that both God and your priest know that and appreciate it ~ and so does your beloved Matthew.

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Thanks Marty. I hope that my husband comes with me. He hasn't in a very long time. I will ask him anyway. If he says no, then I know of another mom that recently lost her son and I'll sit with her. I feel like I'm going to need someone to hold me up. At least we can lean on each other.

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Good for you, Cindy! Our heartfelt prayers will be with you. I think nerdy girls are great, for the record! :) I'm glad you're making new friends, sounds like you needed some. I'm trying to also.

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Thanks.. and yes I surely needed new friends. I realize that more and more each day. I could probably stand to replace a few relatives as well. haha.

The weekend went well with a little trip but I couldn't bring myself to the mass on Sunday as planned. I am certain that the prayers were said in my absence, as planned. I prayed alone at home instead. 6 months feels like such a long time now, missing him every day. I really didn't know that I could miss anyone this much.

More suicides in the news this weekend had me on edge. There's a new Army study out about suicides too, and it sits on the front page of all publications here today. I live next to Fort Hood, Texas, so you can imagine the subject is never far away.

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Haha, I love your sense of humor! Couldn't we all! :)

I'm sorry for what you're going through, I can imagine it'd be hard to live in TX right now with that subject uppermost in your mind. :(

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