So sad

[smilingless]

In October 2015 I had a telephone call while at work , my brother suddenly died after a Brain aneurism  I managed to get to the hospital but he had gone, then my sister who had stage 4 cancer, died in November I feel I hadn't grieved for my brother then my sister died I don't know how to cope as I was the eldest and feel it should have been me first!! I need help to cope!! Christmas and new year went in a blur!!  and to start the new year full of sadness is hard to bear.

[hollowheart]

Oh my God, Smilingless, that is absolutely traumatic. I'm so sorry for your losses. I am sure your head is still spinning. Are you the only sibling left? I lost my sister in October of 2015 too, so I know that same feeling of having so much sadness right before the holidays.

I heard a friend tell someone to try to grieve each loss separately. I know that is like telling you to skate up an ice mountain, but if you can give time to both your brother and sister each you are grieving both but not just in one lump of overwhelming sadness. A grief counselor may be able to help with this. I know counseling is not for everyone, but if you feel like you can't cope and have no one to talk to that may help.

This is so tragic and unfair, my heart breaks for you.

[kayc]

Smilingless,

I am so sorry for the losses of both your brother and sister.  Either one would have seemed more than you could bear, but to lose both must seem overwhelming!  

Have you considered seeing a grief counselor to help you sort through your array of emotions?  I had to do that when my husband died as I was in shock and didn't know where to start.

I'm sure the holidays did seem a blur...most of my first year of grief was a blur.  I hope you feel free to come here and post any time you feel the need, you have plenty of company here that can relate to some of what you're going through.

[Cathyc]

HI Smilingness, I am so sorry to hear that news. Its going to be very, very hard for you to deal with the loss of both siblings. Please keep us posted.

[enna]

Dear Smilingless, This news is so very hard to hear. I am so sorry for your losses. We here are a collective group who will wrap our arms around you and be here for you. 

Anne

[virgo_gal]

Hi smilingless, I am so sorry for your losses. I lost my only brother at the end of September, 2015. I got a phone call too when I was on my way back from work. Those words still haunt me. I was already too late to reach the hospital..

My heart breaks for you that you faced two losses one after the other.

As kayc and cathyc said, please keep in touch.