My Dad went suddenly

[Graciehoo]

My dad is/was 65 when he passed away May 16th, 2016. I am 24. He passed away in his sleep and I am still in shock. I just can't believe he is gone and it's overwhelming to have lost one of my best friends and biggest supporters. He understood me so well and was the most positive person in the world. Our last conversation was about going fishing together and I was planning on going to my home-state to visit my parents the next week after he passed away. I just don't know how to heal from this. I don't want to forget him and I'm afraid part of healing requires me to forget him, and I don't want to. I can't imagine my children growing up with their grandpa. He was so funny, positive, a leader and always so quick to make a joke and lighten the mood. I just wish I knew he wasn't feeling well. I thought I would be older when I would have to go through this and it's just too soon. I feel as though I have aged 20 years. I feel my dad in my heart and am trying to remain strong. I joined this site because I just needed to vent. This sucks, and I hate it.

[MartyT]

1 hour ago, Graciehoo said:

I'm afraid part of healing requires me to forget him, and I don't want to.

Oh my dear, please, please do not burden yourself with such a horrible notion! I don't know where you got the idea that healing in grief requires that you forget the person you love so much. Why in the world would you ~ or anyone ~ want to do that? I strongly encourage you to do whatever you can to remember, to honor and to memorialize your father. That is how he will live on, in your heart, in your mind, and in your memories of him. And that is how you can make sure that your children grow up knowing all about their grandfather. Certainly take time to digest the reality of his death, to sit with the pain of it, to acknowledge and express your thoughts and feelings about this untimely loss. But don't ever think you must forget your father. Talk about him. Tell us all about him, and what about him made him so special in your life. Think about the legacies he has left you ~ what truths and values he has taught you and what it is that makes you love him so much. Write those things down, along with your memories of him. Do whatever you can to nourish and keep those memories alive! That's what will help you heal. (And please take a minute or two to read this: Parent Loss: Continuing Their Song.)  ♥

[kayc]

No, we never forget them, we honor them!  I am sorry for the loss of your dad, my father died way too young too.