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mfh

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About mfh

  • Rank
    Advanced Member
  • Birthday 04/04/1940

Profile Information

  • Your gender
    Female
  • Location (city, state)
    USA Wisconsin
  • Interests
    Spirituality; Meditation; Nature; Bentley, my Golden Retriever Therapy Dog; People; Classical and Folk music; Watercolor; Reading; and most important-assisting others in many ways.

Previous Fields

  • Date of Death
    March 27, 2010
  • Name/Location of Hospice if they were involved:
    Baraboo, Wisconsin

Recent Profile Visitors

3,207 profile views
  1. Thank you. I so agree about the fires. Like others here, I am sure we have connections to those fires with loved ones living in the areas and I think of the wild life and growth that is being destroyed to say nothing of the buildings including homes. Most likely. We are surely learning or can learn as a country to do what you here do daily, support and care for each other.
  2. Hello everybody, I see some familiar faces and names as I read posts. For those of you who do not know me, I am Mary, a colleague of Marty's and a former member and then moderator here. I will be covering the boards until Marty's power is back on. It could be a day or two or longer. I will check in a couple of times a day, read new posts and respond as needed. Probably the most important thing you might want t to know about me is that I lost my beloved husband Bill in 2010 and joined these boards to gain support. It was the worst day of my life and I had no clue how to walk through it. As a therapist of many years I knew grief and loss well. I even knew many personal losses. But Bill's death was in a whole new world. With hard work and lots of support and time I am still here, still carry Bill in my heart a d soul daily, still miss him, and am creating a life for myself. You can read any of my posts if interested. In the meantime, I am here and Marty will notify me when power is on again. It appears the surge was, so far, not as damaging as anticipated but MSNBC is saying they will know more tomorrow. Let us hold each other and Marty in our hearts in these personal and global trying times. peace in our pain, Mary
  3. Had to check in and see this exhibit. It is incredible. Classy, well presented, great art....and all for a worthy cause. Congratulations on what you are doing to support these discussion groups. Wish I was in AZ and could stop by. I hope every piece cells and that many people come to support this. Marty has been an exceptional, compassionate, caring founder and moderator for many years and it does my heart good to see this continue and this project underway. Peace to all, Mary
  4. Bentley

    For those who remember me... My sweet Golden Retriever Bentley died this morning. So many here were so kind when he was diagnosed 2 years ago.
  5. Hello mfh-I see you have a therapy dog...I have a therapy cat! They are amazing animals. I don't know how they figure out what their job is and how to do it, but they do. I also do watercolors, but I haven't been painting since my dad really went downhill and then died. I've been too flattened and disorganized. Hopefully I'll get going again once I get to summer break (in 47 days); it would be good for me to be painting flowers again. Meanwhile, Lena continues to see her people at both of her jobs, a SNF and an assisted living place; they need her.

    1. mfh

      mfh

      Yes, Be tley is a certified therapy dog. He has cancer now and is on borrowed time so soon I will lose my buddy. I can not tell you how sad I am. As for watercolor, I started painting after my husbamd Bill died a d it helped me express my pain. I still paint but not as often. I am so very sorry about your loss of your dear Dad. I will hold you in my prayers a d heart. You will paint again, at the mome t that is right for you. In the mea time, take one day...one hour...at a time. I wish you peace on this difficult journey. Mary

    2. Clematis

      Clematis

      I am so sorry about Bentley-that must be so difficult to know that he is on borrowed time. Just imagining the anguish is painful. I love Lena so much-I cannot even imagine losing her, although I am very likely to outlive her.

      I had cats when I was younger, but became extremely allergic and asthmatic to cats and had to find my two cats new homes. When I said good-bye to my cat Mitten, I was devastated because I didn't think I would ever have a pet again. I would think I saw her out of the corner of my eye for years, and the sight of a pet store never stopped making me feel sad.

      But then I moved from polluted Tucson to a small town with clean air, and also had years of allergy shots. I was doing Twitter as a volunteer for the local humane society, sprucing up photos to make pets look more appealing-and adoptable. One day I was looking at local HSS pets to pick one or two to promote, I saw Lena's picture on the screen. I just knew she was my cat and I had to go get her.

      I knew in the 15 years since I said goodbye to Mitten that my cat allergy had improved, but I had no idea how much. It was definitely a risk, but without even thinking, I grabbed my car keys and set off to adopt her. I was a little worried in the first few days together, but it was fine. When I realized that I was actually going to be able to keep this marvelous animal and live with her, I was so ecstatic I wanted to share it-and her-with the world. That was the start and the core of how she became a therapy cat. And now, I am her primary client. I need a lot of therapy...

  6. MONDAY UPDATE Marty's service call has now been postponed until some time tomorrow. Frustrating for all concerned. I have communicated to her that everyone here is taking good care of each other. Peace Mary
  7. Update on Marty as of Friday evening Marty has informed me that she cannot get a service response until sometime Monday in spite of all of her efforts. So she will be off line through Monday. She asked me to tell you that she is counting on each and every one of you to take good care of one another until she is back. As a personal favor to Marty, I will be checking in for emergency purposes only. Take good care. Peace, Mary
  8. Update on Marty

    Update on Marty as of Friday evening Marty has informed me that she cannot get a service response until sometime Monday in spite of all of her efforts. So she will be off line through Monday. She asked me to tell you that she is counting on each and every one of you to take good care of one another until she is back. As a personal favor to Marty, I will be checking in for emergency purposes only. Take good care. Peace, Mary
  9. Update on Marty as of Friday evening Marty has informed me that she cannot get a service response until sometime Monday in spite of all of her efforts. So she will be off line through Monday. She asked me to tell you that she is counting on each and every one of you to take good care of one another until she is back. As a personal favor to Marty, I will be checking in for emergency purposes only. Take good care. Peace, Mary
  10. iheartm said: " I've asked Marty to delete my account so not to worry, I won't be "attacking" anyone anymore once she is back online. Thanks for refusing to even try to see any validity in anything I had to say and instead just jumped all over me accusing me of attacking. Feels great to have no family, no friends that are widows and no support groups to join." Dear iheartm, I am so sorry you feel you must leave when so many here have reached out to you. I will pass along to Marty your request to have your name removed from the membership list. I am especially sorry you have made this decision in view of how people here have reached out to you. I do hope you find the support you are seeking. I do believe firmly (after reading this string) that it is certainly here to be found but I respect your decision to look elsewhere. Mary
  11. Mary here. I am a former moderator stepping in for Marty until she can get back on line. Many here know me but many do not as I have not been on the forums for many months. I am also a bereaved spouse, having lost the love of my life 6 years ago. I am also a psychotherapist and grief counselor of 40 years. Just to let you know who is typing here. I have read much of this string and It is sad when someone feels a need to leave because they do not feel supported. Especially when these groups are filled with supportive people. I can not say what Marty has said about the tension here any more clearly or better than she has said it. I would hope that anyone who is considering leaving or who is feeling unsupported would scroll back through this string and re-read Marty's many posts addressing the tension. People are free on these forums to share their pain basically on any forum and all of us here are called on to read and respond from a place of love and compassion. Judging, putting "should" on ourselves or others does not work. Time for folks to take a breath, read Marty's wise input, and reach out in love. I do not think anyone here intentionally wants to hurt anyone. The upset we feel is within each of us....everyone here is in pain and so looking inside to our own pain when we feel upset by something someone types is a good starting place. Even after six years I find myself being hypersensitive to what people say, people who have no intention of saying anything to upset me. This journey through grief is tenuous, and we frequently react to others instead of responding. Yes, I still do this occasionally. Judging anyone just does not work. I hope everyone here stays and continues to just be present in love to each other in their pain....empathic compassionate caring. I will be checking back in now amd then until Marty gets power back in her home. These forums helped me so much when I felt hopeless. I know that is and can be true for everyone here. I wish each of you peace as you also struggle with loss. Mary
  12. As of this morning Marty's power and internet is still out. She and I are in co tact often. I will be checking in here often also. Peace, Mary
  13. Thank you. How are you doing, Karen?
  14. Mary (mfh) here. Many of you will remember me as a member and as a moderator. Marty contacted me and asked me to announce that she is off line due to a problem with the power at her home and therefore unable to get on the internet. She will be back on lind here when the power is back on but did not know when that would be. I will check back with her later for an update and will post it. Peace, Mary
  15. Thank you so much. It is good to see familiar faces....Things are going pretty well. Peace to all, Mary
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