My heart goes out to everyone here.
My 80-yr old father is having lots of health problems and now things seem to be getting worse. He was diagnosed with lung cancer a little over 2 years ago. He had surgery to remove a lobe of his lung, and radiation. They didn't really stage it at the time, but after treatment it seemed things were going well. But 5 years before he was diagnosed with Chronic Lymphocytic Leukemia (CLL) and COPD. He was also taking blood thinners for Afib. In the past year he has developed problems with not having enough platelets. They treated that with infusions and took away his blood thinner. About 6 months ago he started having pain in his lower back and leg, constantly. So couple of months ago we found out that the cancer has spread to the spine. Now they are saying he has stage IV cancer. He had radiation for the spine which ended about 3 weeks ago, but he has still been in a lot of pain. He has become very week. He started using a cane a few months ago to now a walker. He has fallen a few times too Mom had to call someone to help get him up. About a month ago he had fluid on his lungs that had to be removed. 6 months ago he could walk and do things himself. Now he's on the walker and has developed worsening incontinence. He doesn't want to eat, but he's doing better with that now. He’s a little confused too, which scares me. He is now is the hospital with pneumonia after my mother called an ambulance because he was so weak and couldn’t breath or walk. They also found a fractured vertebrae, from the cancer, which they said they won't do anything about because they are afraid of bleeding. The same goes for the little bit of fluid on his lungs. He was just transferred to rehab. The pneumonia is getting better, but always something happens. He's been doing physical therapy for the past few days.
I am so scared. It seems all I do is cry, even as I write this. I not sure how to do this. I feel like I'm losing my dad, little by little and something could happen at any time. I live about 1000 miles away from everyone, which makes it harder. I rely on my mother to give me daily updates. My husband says to stay positive, but I'm trying, not very well. My mother is there all the time with him and she has her own issues. She needs a hip replacement and is in constant pain, which she can't do anything about right now until my dad is stable. She’s doing the best she can.
Plus my sister is battling breast cancer. She will be undergoing a mastectomy in 2 weeks. I'm worried about her too. She had a kidney transplant as a teenager so there are other health issues to take into account. The doctor said her prognosis is good, with a very low chance (<1%) that it could come back or move.
Last week I happened to have an appointment with my family doctor, one day after my dad went to the hospital. I was very upset and thought I could talk to him a little about how upset I am and having trouble dealing. So I was crying when he came into the room. I told him what was wrong. He listened for a couple of minutes and then said "Well, we can't talk about this anymore. I only have about 10 minutes so we need to talk about you (overall health, medication, etc). And nobody lives forever. Just pray." That just upset me even more. I went through the exam. Now I feel like he just dismissed me. Was I wrong? Should I not have brought it up? The family doctor does not help you with those kind of issues? I know that he's not a psychologist. I just thought I should tell him and how its affecting me?f
Sorry if this is rambling. I just wanted to get it all out....thanks.
