Hi Benita, I have not been to this site much, but decided to log on today. I too feel very alone even when I am in a group of people, and so miss the hugs and kisses. I make it a point to give all the hugs I can now. It is in no way the same, but it does help me feel somewhat more normal. I have the most difficulty in seeing or hearing how others think their loved ones will always be there, just as I did, and don't take advantage of every opportunity to share their love. I have been in a very bad emotional state lately and I truely miss myself. I feel like I am faking every smile and action. I wonder if I might need to be hospitalized because I can't find the strength to cope. I too wear my husband's favorite T shirt, which gives me some comfort. I find that taking my dogs for a walk or driving to the highest point I can find and overlooking the city makes me feel better. I guess just being close to nature makes me feel closer to my husband and God. Bless you all and XOXOXO to you too! Cheryl