Hi Emily, I’m so sorry. While I was reading your post, I remember my experience. At 20 weeks of my pregnancy, I had spotting and the doctor advised me to rest. Then again, at 32 weeks, I had cramps, I called my doctor and she told me to immediately go to the hospital. I was there the whole day to monitor my baby’s heartbeat. I was crying to God not to take away my baby because I already love him so much. I had infertility treatments for 2 years before I got pregnant and that’s my first baby. Thank God, I delivered my baby full term and he’s turning 16 years old tomorrow. I would like to encourage you to take your time to grieve. I was reading this article, http://bit.ly/2q6JL8I, and it says that it’s common to experience sadness, anger and guilt. It’s important for you and your husband to communicate your feelings to one another. We may not understand the reason why this thing happened but only God knows. He knows exactly what you are going through and understands exactly how you feel. Praying for you that you will be strengthened as you pass through this, I pray for your healing physically and emotionally, and He will give the desires of your heart as you trust Him. Tell all your concerns to Him because He cares for you. Thank you for sharing.