I had to put my Jack Russell/Beagle, Chaya, to sleep on Thursday. She was 16 years, 8 months old and I had her since she was 5 1/2 months old. She was blind, deaf, and had severe arthritis. We tried everything my vet recommended. Wednesday night she was in terrible pain. My vet said I could wait until over the weekend to spend some time with her, but we didn't want a repeat of the pain she had been in the previous night. I am widowed and live alone. My boyfriend for the last six years is with me most nights. He was with me when I took her to the vet and afterwards. He built her a box and buried her on a hill on my property. She is wrapped in her favorite blanket.
My house is empty. There are no little paw clicks in the kitchen. No one is sleeping on her chair. No one is in her backyard fence or her dog house. She was the only dog I have ever had. I can't believe how sad I am or how much I miss her. Sometimes I don't think I can stand it. I am retired and spend a lot of time at home. I do some volunteer work and take a few hours each day working out at the Y. I have friends I see for lunch or other things. I just don't know how to get through the day when I have to be home. My house has always been my safe place. Now it's my alone place. I know it has only been a few days, but how can I get through this? I feel as though I am slogging around under water.