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Grief Healing Discussion Groups

bubbe

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  • Your relationship to the individual who died
    N/A
  • Date of Death
    05/10/2018
  • Name/Location of Hospice if they were involved:
    N/A

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  • Your gender
    Female
  • Location (city, state)
    Gastonia

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  1. Thanks for your reply. it is so good to "talk" to someone who understands. I think the upset in my routine is one of the hardest things. I don't get up and take Chaya out, then feed her. I don't hear her walking around in the kitchen while I have coffee. I am so used to having to run errands in spurts so I can come home to take her out. I miss seeing her in the living room on her chair while I am watching TV. The blanket I had on her chair is gone. It is wrapped around her in her casket and buried with her. I used to close my bedroom door when I was out so she didn't have an accident in there as she got older. I don't close it now and it feels so wrong. The house is so quiet and there is no one to talk to. I try to keep music on, but it's not the same. I know I will get though this. If I made it through 2011 when I lost my father and husband within three months of each other, I can get through anything. But I feel so empty. I am so tired of people telling me to just get another dog. I don't want another dog. I want Chaya. I will never get another dog so I don't have to go through this again.
  2. Thank you for your reply. Knowing someone understands helps. I will read some of the posts. Right now I just need to get through the day.
  3. I had to put my Jack Russell/Beagle, Chaya, to sleep on Thursday. She was 16 years, 8 months old and I had her since she was 5 1/2 months old. She was blind, deaf, and had severe arthritis. We tried everything my vet recommended. Wednesday night she was in terrible pain. My vet said I could wait until over the weekend to spend some time with her, but we didn't want a repeat of the pain she had been in the previous night. I am widowed and live alone. My boyfriend for the last six years is with me most nights. He was with me when I took her to the vet and afterwards. He built her a box and buried her on a hill on my property. She is wrapped in her favorite blanket. My house is empty. There are no little paw clicks in the kitchen. No one is sleeping on her chair. No one is in her backyard fence or her dog house. She was the only dog I have ever had. I can't believe how sad I am or how much I miss her. Sometimes I don't think I can stand it. I am retired and spend a lot of time at home. I do some volunteer work and take a few hours each day working out at the Y. I have friends I see for lunch or other things. I just don't know how to get through the day when I have to be home. My house has always been my safe place. Now it's my alone place. I know it has only been a few days, but how can I get through this? I feel as though I am slogging around under water.
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