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Flying Again


STARKISS

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Hi All,

Here I am just five days to go...My thoughts are still very mixed and wonder what will happen on this flight... I just hope that it turns out okay and all this worrying was for nothing... My sister and her friends are all younger and like to hit the bars while me on the other hand hate bars and do not drink... So I guess I will have some time on my own and perhaps this will be a good thing... I will have time to visit old casinoes that my mom and dad liked as well as some new ones they never got to visit... Take care all Shelley

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Shelley,

If you're really unsure as to whether or not the trip will go well, I'll give you my address and you can send me the ticket. :P

Seriously, wow, such a HUGE step for you. Good luck on your trip.

Shauna

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Hi Shauna Marie,

Thank you for the message it made me laugh and wonder how nuts I have been making people as well as myself... I had been wondering because of the negative stuff that happen but I am keeping in my head until after the trip that my mom is watching over me and seeing how much I can win.... My sister tells me that think of it this way would my mom not go again if it was me who died???? I would hope she would so this is what I am going to tell myself when I get that nutty feeling again.... Take care Shelley

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You haven't made anyone nuts, hon.

I am not sure I would be able to do it in your shoes. Heck, I can't watch the same tv channel, go to the same stores, nothing that we would have done together.

I just threw the bit about Vegas 'cuz I SO want to go there and thought maybe I found a way. ;)

I don't buy the "you'd want mom to go, wouldn't you" garbage though. That really isn't an issue. You're about to face some really difficult things and it's as simple as that. I am sure that once you get there and get used to being there and relive a lot of the memories, it will be ok. I remember the first time that I went back home after I moved and I had to relive it all. It was tough, but it was ok. I do want to mention that even if you find this trip really difficult, you will find the next one easier. And do it. Go play some of your mom's favorite games for her. You don't have to spend all of your time doing that, perhaps check out some other parts of Vegas that you never seen before, if that's possible. (I've never been there.) Make it an adventure for yourself. Honor your parents, but build some soothing memories of the place for you.

Shauna

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Hi Shauna,

You have certainly given me somethings to think about as I am getting closer to the day of the trip... I leave at 8:35am Toronto time... I am there until Monday night I arrive back in Toronto sometime last Monday night... On Mother's Day I am going to the Imperial Palace Hotel and Casino to their buffet and have a meal that my mom always loved this is my way of saying mom you were the greatest.... Take care Shelley

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Hey All,

Well here I am the day before I am to fly out to Las Vegas... I never thought a trip like this would be as difficult as this one has been to plan and go... Take care Shelley

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Shelley, dear ~ Stand up straight, keep your shoulders back and your head held high. Think positive thoughts when you get on that plane tomorrow, and know that we're all rooting for you! And throw a quarter or two in one of those slots for us when you get there! We are very, very proud of you. You GO, girl! :wub:

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Hi Marty,

Thank you for all the encouragement you have given me during this very difficult time in my life... I figure the way I am feeling I will be lucky to fall asleep by 1100pm and than I guess I will take graval and than sleep as the graval takes affect... I will write more when I return on Monday night... Take care Shelley

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Hi Leeann,

Well maybe I should just start with the things that went right... We missed our flight because the airline changed the time from 830am to 800am which we did not know about... The second thing that went wrong was the room selection was wrong... The next thing that was wrong was my sister and I did not see eye to eye for some of the trip... I was left to fend for myself most of the night times because I did not drink so they all went to the bars all the nights we were there...I lost all my money earlier than I expected...Mother's day was extremely difficult for me down there... Everyone had special phone calls made to them and I being not a mother or having a mother for any calls.... I broke the chain that my mom gave me it was the last gift she had given me before she died...I cried three times for long periods of time.. I tried to do something new but I just was not into it much... On the way home the trip was delayed for about half and hour.... The airplane was so very hot on the way home that I thought I was going to die... Someone asked me what my favorite part of the trip was and I said coming home.... Shelley

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Hi All,

I just want to thank everyone for their well wishes and prayers during this hard time of my life... It meant alot to know people really cared... Unfortunely it was not to be a happy time for me... Take care and Thanks again Shelley

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starkiss,

I wonder if there is something with the chain. I'll explain.

On my dad's four-year anniversary, I was at my godfather's store and broke something. I also broke something on Christmas Day at his house (just a glass.) Since I've moved here, they are the ONLY two things I've broken. I worked in my godfather's store for almost a year and never broke anything. I've also been to his house many times and he has a LOT of expensive breakables. Never broke anything before, but the glass, which he has about thirty others of. :D

Now I have some questions for you. Let's just say you won $100,000 instead of losing it. Would that really have settled well with you? Winning all that money and no mom to share in the winnings with.

If no one had called when you were around, would that have made anything better? Or would you still have felt sad because of the day it was and the fact your mom isn't here?

Let's say none of them went drinking. Would that have anything better?

To you, what was the whole point of the trip? To have a good time--or to go back where you lost your mom and face it square in the eye?

I'd say it was to face it and that, my dear, you did just that. It isn't a very easy thing to do. I still have trouble going clothes shopping at the store where I went with my mom, etc. My heart isn't in it. And I could never spend much time in the room where my mom actually died. I cannot imagine doing what you did. You went there, you stayed a few days--I understand the full length of time, too. That is pretty brave of you. You may not have had the best time in the world, but what has been easy on this danged road? Everytime we turn around there's another first, another battle to overcome.

Take care of you,

Shauna

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Hi Shauna,

You are right the whole reason for my trip was that I needed to go back there... It is like falling off a horse if you do not get right back on you will never... I feel this way about Las Vegas... Just because mom can not be there why should I not go there for me... Take care Shelley

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Thank you All,

Thank you all for your kindness and patience that you have shown me through the last few months... I think I probably drove most of you crazy... I hope that everyone here realizes how special this place really is... Thanks again and Take care Shelley

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