Grievig A Spouse

[gerigp]

I just lost my husbadn of 44 years 11 days ago. I cannot een describe the immense hurt, grief, sense of loneliness, despair, and emptiness. I closed myself off for 4 days in a bedroom at my daugher's (with our 2 cats) and just cried. That didn't help, but I honestly doubt anything will. I want so much to be ith him. I stopped taking my heart meds and eating so perhaps I can join him sooner. He was my whole life although we do have 4 children and 9 grandchildren. We had a wonderful relationship, did everything together and he was my best friend. So much of me left when he did, I just wish it had been my body & soul as well, as I now feel no will, no wanting to go on and I cannot imagine life without him in it. I know people go through this al the time, but how????? I miss him sooooooooooooo very much and want him back, even though he did suffer the last year and I would not want him to go through any more suffering. I do not know what to do. Our kids are spread around the country and only 1 and 2 grandkids live near where we live. The 2 up North in NY want me to stay with them ( I am at my daughter's in NY now). I hate going to sleep because then I know I will wake up and he will not be here and I do not want to face that. I hate going to bed because I always reached out to toucfh him so I knew he was there and then I could sleep. My whole being hurts and my heart actually does feel broken. How can I get through this? He was in hospic just short of 24 hours when he left me. If someone out there can help, please...........................

[H.A.B.]

Hello gerigp. My heart goes out to u in your time of grief. Tomorrow my husband will have been gone for 12 weeks/3 months. Yes I am still counting. I feel your pain and I know your pain all too well. I have my children to keep me going but somedays it is so difficult. Time helps but it will not take away the emptiness nor will it stop the tears. The month of February was special for us...we met on the 3rd, started dating on the 27th and were married on the 27th also...this month hurts. But somehow u keep going, don't ask me how, I don't know...u just keep getting up every morning and going. It took us 6 weeks before we quit crying. Every one is different, every grief undescribable...My thoughts are with u and I shall pray for u too.

[Charlie]

My heart goes out to you and your pain. I too lost my husband of 46 years, this Feb 22nd would have been our 47th wedding anniversary... I lost him this past Oct, 2004 to Prostate cancer. He too suffered for over a year and his last month on hospice was so emotional for the both of us. He was so afraid to die and I to lose him. I still cry a lot and somtimes out of the blue something will trigger a memory and I will be a mess.

I want to tell you it gets better, and somedays it does, but losing someone you have spent most of you life with is a hard fact to understand when they are no longer with us.

I have tried to keep busy and have just now taken a part time job to keep my mind occupied so I do not grieve all day, every day.

Please hang in there and each day will get a little easier. You will never forget, but the memories will start to be of comfort and not of pain. All of us grieve in our own ways, but we are all the same in the pain we experience. No one knows this feeling until you experience it yourself.

Hugs to you,

Grace

ONLY YOU

7/1/38 10/20/04

[bob long]

I just lost my husbadn of 44 years 11 days ago. I cannot een describe the immense hurt, grief, sense of loneliness, despair, and emptiness. I closed myself off for 4 days in a bedroom at my daugher's (with our 2 cats) and just cried. That didn't help, but I honestly doubt anything will. I want so much to be ith him. I stopped taking my heart meds and eating so perhaps I can join him sooner. He was my whole life although we do have 4 children and 9 grandchildren. We had a wonderful relationship, did everything together and he was my best friend. So much of me left when he did, I just wish it had been my body & soul as well, as I now feel no will, no wanting to go on and I cannot imagine life without him in it. I know people go through this al the time, but how????? I miss him sooooooooooooo very much and want him back, even though he did suffer the last year and I would not want him to go through any more suffering. I do not know what to do. Our kids are spread around the country and only 1 and 2 grandkids live near where we live. The 2 up North in NY want me to stay with them ( I am at my daughter's in NY now). I hate going to sleep because then I know I will wake up and he will not be here and I do not want to face that. I hate going to bed because I always reached out to toucfh him so I knew he was there and then I could sleep. My whole being hurts and my heart actually does feel broken. How can I get through this? He was in hospic just short of 24 hours when he left me. If someone out there can help, please...........................

i lost my wife of 57 years and friend of 65 years last july 27th, the hurt is very bad

and at times we don't know what to do,

i have a saying by henry scott holland that i have on the wall and i read it every day it helps

here it is.

i have only slipped away into the next room

i am i and you are you.what ever we were to each other

that we are still

call me by my old familiar name, speak to me in the easy way

which you always used.

play, smile, think of me,

all is well

bob long

[Guest Gamer205]

I am so sorry about your loss I hope you feel better later,It is hard lossing people that you are close to.

[earlspeanut]

Hi, my name is Kathy.. I lost my husband of 34 years due to a motorcycle accident, we were coming home from a bike run when a woman hit us. i awoke in the hospital 3 days later to be told my husband was dead. this was on april 19th of 2003. two years this month.

I can't seem to figure out where I am going.Earl was my

life, my past present and future.. I loved him dearly. and i don't know how to go on without him.

I am not sure how this forum works, but I am trying it.

Kathy

[RonnieLou]

Gerigp,

I lost my husband of 25 years 3 months ago....I understand how you feel. The best advice that I can give you is to not look too far into the future. You need to only get through 1 day at a time for now....After awhile you will be able to plan 2 or 3 days ahead....That is about all I have been able to do now....But you do have a reason to keep on living...you still have a purpose! I will be in prayer for you that God would carry you during this time and give you an inner peace that all is going to be ok.

[earlspeanut]

Hi, my name is Kathy.. I lost my husband of 34 years due to a motorcycle accident, we were coming home from a bike run when a woman hit us. i awoke in the hospital 3 days later to be told my husband was dead. this was on april 19th of 2003. two years this month.

I can't seem to figure out where I am going.Earl was my

life, my past present and future.. I loved him dearly. and i don't know how to go on without him.

I am not sure how this forum works, but I am trying it.

Kathy