lightdancer Posted June 29, 2015 Report Share Posted June 29, 2015 I feel like I'm entering a new stage, a new time. I feel immobilized on one level and functional on another. I think I am withdrawing a little more as a realize what a solo journey from tragedy to transformation it is. It is not for lack of loving family and friends, it is just the need to resolve my own loss. I dream about people dying and being at Chloe's service, feeling very sad. It is almost as though the reality of the magnitude of the loss is very sharp now. I am feeling things about her death that I could not feel in those first days. I can see it all, and with that comes a new wave of grief. And yet, I can feel moments of light and life. I look the same on the the outside, but my foundation is tilted. Inside there is that stream of sorrow and processing where I'm at and who I am, what planet I've landed on and how to accept and adapt to it. I find a greater weariness from the work I am doing. But I have hope and courage that I will find my way. "May I be at peace. May my heart remain open. May I know the beauty of my own true nature. May I be healed." -Joan Borysenko, Fire in the Soul http://cindyweaver2015.blogspot.com/ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kayc Posted June 29, 2015 Report Share Posted June 29, 2015 You don't say how long it's been, but I am sorry for your loss. It comes to my mind a picture someone posted once of a vase that was cracked and the crack was filled in with gold...a description of what goes on within us. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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