KATPILOT Posted October 23, 2015 Report Share Posted October 23, 2015 There was a time when I would get sick and come home, get in bed and have this angel tuck me in, pick up my prescription, fix me some soup, and you know the story. Sounds pretty common doesn't it? Now when you get sick it's so not the same. You feel more alone than ever and a little more sad. I found myself at the doctors today dealing with bronchitis only now I go to the pharmacy, get the meds, go home, crawl into bed and realize what else I don't have any longer. I miss that gentle hand on my face, and her soft voice. Grief seems a little harder when you're sick. Perhaps it's because we feel more vulnerable. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
iPraiseHim Posted October 23, 2015 Report Share Posted October 23, 2015 Agreed. I caught a cold Tuesday despite all my attempts to prevent it. Life is just different now. I appreciated the comfort and love expressed then. It's another example of how we miss our beloved spouse. My wife comforted me in so many ways. My wife loved me as unconditionally as anyone could. It was a refreshing oasis in a harsh and selfish world. I experienced God's love for me through our loving, committed marriage covenant.Priceless. Yes, I still miss my wife and best friend, especially when I'm sick and under the weather. Shalom Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
enna Posted October 23, 2015 Report Share Posted October 23, 2015 Well, I hope both of you begin to feel better soon. Bronchitis is nothing to fool with and I hope you have a chance to rest over the weekend. So many of us seem to be more susceptible to health issues when our spouses are no longer with us. It is very hard to be sick when we are alone. I hope both of you take tender-loving care as you heal from your upper respiratory illnesses. Don't forget to keep hydrated. Anne Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MartyT Posted October 23, 2015 Report Share Posted October 23, 2015 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jame57 Posted October 24, 2015 Report Share Posted October 24, 2015 Being sick when you're on your own is worse. Such a feeling of vulnerabilty. I had a nasty stomach bug earlier this week and whilst awake in the early hours and feeling rotten thought "If something happened to me who would know?". At 52 living on my own for the first time in my life takes some getting used to! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kayc Posted October 24, 2015 Report Share Posted October 24, 2015 Gosh, you, all too? I'm sorry, get well, all of you! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WolfsKat Posted December 19, 2015 Report Share Posted December 19, 2015 I had surgery (outpatient) the 8th of this month, almost exactly 8 weeks after I lost my beloved Connor. While I had a wonderful friend stay with me through it (had to, I was not allowed to come & have it done alone) and stay with me for the first 24 hours post-op...and check in on me daily thereafter, it definitely hits home just HOW much you are very alone! Connor would've fussed over me, looked after me, worried about me....and be my cheerleader in recuperation (still ongoing). The post-op pain I have medication for.....but the awful feeling of being so very alone while incapacitated there is no pill for. I can take care of my basic needs fairly well...but I guess we all like having someone at hand who loves you and wants to "take care" of you. As was mentioned in a previous posting, grief is harder when we are sick, and also makes us feel even more vulnerable! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
enna Posted December 19, 2015 Report Share Posted December 19, 2015 I am glad that you are recovering from your surgery. It is and always will be difficult to go it alone when we have health issues. My Jim was my cheerleader too when I needed extra attention after surgeries. He would surprise me with treats that put a smile on my face. I love ice cream (chocolate) and he would bring me different kinds out of the blue. I miss that. I understand what you mean when you say you feel so very alone while incapacitated and there is no pill for it. Continue to recover and I send you hugs. Anne 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kayc Posted December 19, 2015 Report Share Posted December 19, 2015 WolfsKat, You are so right! I went through surgery two days before Christmas last year and a neighbor was supposed to help me but instead just dropped me off and I was on my own. I was terrified! What if I couldn't get up by myself? Could I build a fire and fix something to eat? I couldn't reach things in cupboards or even use the can opener or chop things. I'd prepared food ahead but the discharge papers said I couldn't eat them. (What do they think, giving it to you AFTER the surgery? Not all of us have a husband to run across town and buy something!) My kids didn't even check on me. You know who did? Anne (Enna, above). I had complications, my heart stopped during surgery and I kept stopping breathing for hours after the surgery. I never felt so alone! I couldn't help but think how different it'd be if George was still here. We always took such good care of each other. Just knowing there's someone there that cares and will be there for you makes all the difference in the world! I hope you get better real soon. And I hope you know that our thoughts and prayers are with you as you recuperate. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WolfsKat Posted December 20, 2015 Report Share Posted December 20, 2015 Thank you, Kay and Anne.....I appreciate what you posted, so much! Had a "pity party" day today....crying jags, missing Connor SO terribly much....your postings help cheer me up. Bless you both. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kayc Posted December 20, 2015 Report Share Posted December 20, 2015 I hope you feel better each day! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KATPILOT Posted March 2, 2016 Author Report Share Posted March 2, 2016 One thing about my life now and I'm sure others can relate is how we always had someone watch our back. I literally mean watch our back. Today I am off to have a skin cancer removed from my nose which began soon after Kathy died. That would be nearly five years and since I was dealing with the shock and depression early on, I could have cared less about that little spot on my nose. Point is, she wouldn't have. She would have had me at the doctors long ago. That is the kind of nagging that makes ya just want to hug her! But it's not there now. I have to do it on my own and luckily for me, it's not life threatening but point is, it could have been. We men sometimes let things slide too long when it comes to issues like this. They told me by the way that it is called "basal-cell carcinoma" which is the most common type, very slow growing, and easy to remove though I'm told my nose will look slightly different. I said "if it doesn't come out like Michael Jackson's, I'm cool but if you choose to live alone for the rest of your time, get a good hand mirror so you can "watch your back". 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
enna Posted March 2, 2016 Report Share Posted March 2, 2016 I love the idea of a hand mirror. Good luck on the removal of the skin cancer. Nothing to fool around with. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KATPILOT Posted March 3, 2016 Author Report Share Posted March 3, 2016 Well I made it and of course the good news is they got it all. I've got two black eyes, it looks like I went through a windshield, and it hurts like hell but all that will pass. Stiches come out in a week. I just wish she was here to make it all better. I was so spoiled. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kayc Posted March 3, 2016 Report Share Posted March 3, 2016 I am so glad it's over! Yeah, anytime something happens to the nose, the eyes get blackened. I hope it heals fast! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MartyT Posted March 3, 2016 Report Share Posted March 3, 2016 Me, too, Stephen! ♥ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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