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You are so right!  It's no wonder you're having all these calamities.  I went back to work within two weeks, even coming in less that a week to do payroll.  I caught myself making mistakes I never would have made before.  My brain was in a fog, for the longest time.

Yes, I do think they have a point, mourning for a year, but I'm not a one for hard and fast rules, one person avoiding music displays mourning, but to another, music might be helpful to their grieving.  And of course I don't think our grief expires at the end of a year just because someone decrees it.  We all need to listen to our inner selves and what we need.

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56 minutes ago, kayc said:

Laura,

This is really weird.  I had a driver hit me 2 1/2 years ago and I was able to view the police report on my insurance site.  I've never heard of anyone keeping this information secret!  It's the law you're supposed to exchange that information at the time of the accident.  I am not familiar with tribal land (even though my husband was Native American) but when it's within the US, I would think federal laws would apply. ???  This is just bizarre!

It is very bizarre and I can't figure out what to do. They don't seem to be able to get the name of the other driver & her insurance information either to me or to my insurance agent. I'm not sure that filing with my insurance company, which has a $5K limit on my medical and I pay a $500 deductible is the way to go since I already have an ambulance ride, an ER bill with an unknown amount, and will have a chiropractor followup. I also have something funny that is going on that I can't figure out related to my vision and balance. Sometimes it seems like what I see from my left and right eye are not altogether connected to each other, and I keep having this thing where I lean over in one direction of another and feel like I am going to fall, but then prevent it by taking a little hop to catch myself. At the reservation ER, all they could do to check this out was to do a visual acuity test-have me stand 20 feet from an eye chart and read it.

It does seem bizarre that I am not allowed to know what happened in an accident that I was involved in. I am not allowed to see the police report or talk to the witnesses...

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Maybe it's time to see an attorney.

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20 minutes ago, kayc said:

You are so right!  It's no wonder you're having all these calamities.  I went back to work within two weeks, even coming in less that a week to do payroll.  I caught myself making mistakes I never would have made before.  My brain was in a fog, for the longest time.

My brain is definitely in a fog, and it's worse since the accident. When I talked to my Dr on the phone, he told me that I should have left work and come to see him on the day of the accident so I could get back to Sedona to see him before the end of the day. When I told him about the odd visual things, he said, "Well, I guess they probably don't have an MRI out there" that I was probably fine, adding, "Well, you're an anxious person"... Well, I'm seeing a chiropractor tomorrow-maybe he will be helpful...

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I swear you are dealing with odd people!  The doctor makes that assessment without having seen you or getting an MRI on you???

BTW, your insurance agent should be going to bat for you, HE/SHE should be the one getting a copy of the police report and furnishing it to you, mine did.  I'd find a different ins. agent if they don't come through for you.

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Hi Laura ~ I just checked with my son, who is an insurance agent in Scottsdale. He says that if your agent cannot obtain the police report, his claims adjuster has the authority to request a copy of the police report. I don't know if the fact that all of this happened on the reservation is a factor, but you might want to check with your agent to see if he has consulted with his company's claims adjuster.

And I agree with Kay ~ you'd be wise to have a face-to-face meeting with your primary care physician to make sure that you are all right.

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Thanks, Marty and Kay, I appreciate your ideas. 

The problem is that if I make the claim through my own insurance company the limit on medical is $5000 and I have to pay a $500 deductible. That might be enough, but if I keep having funny things going on with my vision and balance, it might not be. Also, I'm not crazy about paying $500 if I don't have to. If I can find out the name of the other driver (who was at fault), and her insurance company, I can file a claim with them and in most places the minimum on a person's liability insurance is about $15000-and I don't have to pay a deductible. But the police seem to think that the information on the police report is confidential information. The law is that when you are in an accident, you are to exchange names and insurance information with the other driver, but the police prevented that by keeping us separated because she was harassing me and trying to get me to agree with her fabricated story. So I can't make a claim with her company.

My agent, Melissa, says she can do nothing unless I file a claim with State Farm - my company, but that caps my medical at $5000 and I pay a $500 deductible. 

The way I see it is that the police are basically covering for the other driver, by allowing her to remain anonymous by keeping us apart and then not releasing her name and insurance information to me and my insurance agent. My agent is very good and super nice, and she is also the principal cellist in my community orchestra. Unfortunately, today is her first day back from a vacation and I'm sure she has a lot of other things to deal with than me. She called the tribal police this morning and left a message. They didn't call her back. 

My doctor is leaving for a two week vacation and told me that I am probably fine and that I am an anxious person. I guess he figures that sums it all up. I think he's really really ready to go on vacation...

Maybe I need to wait until I have more information before making a claim, but somehow that seems like a bad idea to wait for several weeks for my Dr to return to town, for the reservation police to complete whatever their process, etc. 

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Yay! My insurance agent was finally able to get the name, insurance company, and policy number of the other driver! This is good. If I had to file through my insurance company, the most it would cover is $5,000 with a $ 500 deductible and I already have an ambulance ride, an ER bill, plans for chiropractic and concussion symptoms. She is from Texas and the minimum medical on liability insurance  is $30,000. So, I shouldn't have to worry about it not being adequate...

On  a humorous note, there was at least class of students out in the parking lot when this occurs, and word of something like the school counselor being involved in a car accident in the school parking lot travels fast. And they all know me, even if they don't see me for counseling, in some part due to my cello, who accompanies me to school almost every day (see picture of Mister Cello below, riding shotgun). The kids had only one question; "Is Mister Cello ok?" Yes, he happened to stay at home on this particular day...

 

Shotgun Cello.JPG

 

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7 hours ago, kayc said:

Maybe it's time to see an attorney.

I was starting to think that...tomorrow I'll see the chiropractor and he'll have some ideas. And now I finally got the woman's info. At least I can get things going now. I imagine some day somehow I'll get to see the police report...

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Oh Laura, I am so glad!  (Both about Mr. Cello and getting the information).  You're in my prayers, no more accidents!

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12 minutes ago, kayc said:

Oh Laura, I am so glad!  (Both about Mr. Cello and getting the information).  You're in my prayers, no more accidents!

Thanks, Kay! I have believed all along that if I could just get through this school year intact, that things would get easier because I would have ten weeks off work to get a lot done. I only have one more day out there of work-Wednesday-and I'll be going out with my friend Mike-almost always we work different days-for coverage-but the last day of the year we're both working and he's driving! It should be a fun day and I won't have to do that long drive!

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It's a good thing Mister Cello wasn't in the car that day...also, since the accident I'm thinking he should go back to wearing his seatbelt in the car. I used to loop the seatbelt through the backpack straps to secure him in the car, to protect him-and me! Here we are at the Flagstaff Folk Festival and at Pickin in the Pines last year. These were little mini-vacations where I wasn't working or taking care of my dad-but I didn't feel too bad about it because we were only an hour away. Pickin in the Pines is a music festival with a 4-day campout. I'd always feel a little guilty about leaving my dad to go camping with Mister Cello, but it was only an hour drive if he needed me, and he always encouraged me to go, and spend time playing music with my friends.

I would get someone to take care of Lena and water my plants, but I worried about my dad. I'd call my sisters and plead with them to check in with him by phone while I was out of town, but they never would. I'd also tell his neighbors to watch out for him, but I still worried. It always bugged me that my sisters-between the two of them-could not make a few phone calls so I could have a little break from the worry, but the truth is probably that I would have worried and called him anyway even if they were also calling him. I probably would have called him even it they were calling him-after all he was my best friend and I always had things to tell him-but it would have been nice to know someone else was checking in with him.

IMG_9393.JPGIMG_0400.JPG

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I love seeing the pictures!  You look so young at fit!  I wouldn't want to share a picture of me unless I could lose 20 lbs. first. :)  And Mr. Cello too, of course!

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Thank you, Marty and Kay! I have a pile of those skirts and wear them all the time, in the winter I keep wearing them but with tights and real shoes. Hiking, canoeing, anything...the place that sells them calls me when they get in a new shipment. One time someone there called me "our uniform girl" since I wear them every day of my life. It has been good in a time like the last 4 months. I never have to think about what to wear-just grab one, find a matching t-shirt, put a flower in my hair and go. Sometimes I even remember to comb my hair... In the first few months after my dadd died, I'd tell myself every day that if I just had a flower in my hair I'd feel better.

Riding a bike with a cello on one's back is a bit of a trick. I try to keep the laws of physics in mind as I get on and off. I try to just focus on getting on or off. The cello weighs a lot less than I do, and since he is tied to me he will go where I go. I just have to really focus and not be distracted by his bumping and shifting as I get on and off. You would think that if I could ride a bike around a campground with a cello on my back, I should be able to negotiate my kitchen without falling, huh?

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You do well, I haven't ridden a bike since I was young.  

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On May 24, 2016 at 5:44 PM, kayc said:

You do well, I haven't ridden a bike since I was young.  

Perhaps it is true...I spent last weekend cavorting around a campground with my cello and my friends, and today was out on uneven ground flying kites with a bunch of kids for hours. Managed to do it without falling or any other problems...seems like progress!

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I'm still sorting through the process of handling this car accident from last Friday, and am having more and more troublesome symptoms related to my vision, balance, and cognitive functioning (memory, focus, accomplishing tasks that I should be able to do easily, etc). I talked to the other driver's insurance guy this morning and he told me that don't care what is in the police report; they will make their own determination who is at fault. I decided to engage an attorney. Tomorrow, I will see the chiropractor, a regular doctor (not a reservation doctor, and also have the car looked at. The attorney seems very good and I think he's going to help me a lot.

On a positive note, I went to a rehearsal of the Jerome Ukulele Orchestra for the first time in two months (although I play the ukulele rather well due to many years of playing classical guitar, I play cello wit them because they love what the low notes add). It was great-when I walked in with Mister Cello, they were so happy to see us, they all applauded... 

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I'm glad you're enlisting the help of an attorney, it sounds like it's needed with how strange this is going.  You definitely need to have your vision, balance, etc. checked out to see what's causing it, an MRI would probably be of help.  And the insurance should pay for it!  They did not, however, pay for the chiropractor my husband saw when he had his accident.  

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12 minutes ago, kayc said:

I'm glad you're enlisting the help of an attorney, it sounds like it's needed with how strange this is going.  You definitely need to have your vision, balance, etc. checked out to see what's causing it, an MRI would probably be of help.  And the insurance should pay for it!  They did not, however, pay for the chiropractor my husband saw when he had his accident.  

They wouldn't pay for a chiropractor? I wonder why...I had the impression they did that all the time...

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Nope, only a "real doctor", we just paid for it ourselves.

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Dang- this accident is worse that I had thought! My dearly beloved primary care physician was not having his best Doctor day when I had this car accident. He was getting ready to go on a two week vacation when I called him. I think had one foot already on vacation and the other foot on a banana peel when he told me, "you're fine – go home – you're an anxious person", when I called him after this accident I had a week ago today, describing headache, dizziness, balance problems, visual distortions, problems with focus and decision-making.

None of that stuff has gone away, and today I saw the nurse practitioner who is covering for my Dr. and she was pretty serious about all of it. She did not look very happy when I told her I'd been driving out to Hopi, if you're flying kites with kids, driving up to Jerome dragging a cello around, and all that. She wants an MRI of my head and neck and they can't get me in until next Friday. Meanwhile she told me to "Lay low", rest, relax, no long-distance driving, no crazy stuff, and no visits to the chiropractor. I can't even go to Flagstaff. Or Jerome. She said going to Cottonwood (17 miles that is all straight except for one big sweeping S-curve that was made much too tight for the speed limit) is kind of pushing it but I do have to go there next Friday to get the MRI.

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Laura,

Do you know someone who could drive you there?  I kind of thought an MRI was in order, I was surprised your doctor didn't order it, vacation or not!  I hope you have a word with him when he gets back, no excuse for his being remiss!

Do let us know what you find out, you'll probably have to wait for results, depends on what setting it's done in, but usually they have your doctor give you the results.  Maybe with him gone a specialist can talk to you?

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My doctor-I really really like him. He is honest, brilliant, funny, and devoted to his patients-and his staff. I've always had a lot of respect and appreciation for what he did for my dad-and he took him on after he had stopped taking new Medicare patients. I'm sure he needs a vacation-he hasn't had one in five years. I just looked at what he had on his email and it's actually almost three weeks that he's going to be gone. But I don't think he gave my situation his full attention, for whatever reason. I don't get the MRI until next Friday, June 3 and I have no idea how long it takes to get the results.

I'm really glad I got the lawyer, since I can count on him to make sure everything gets taken care of. He seems really good. It looks like the car will get fixed and not considered a total-which is great. But I was supposed to start really working hard on getting my bog summer project done. And I'm not supposed to be doing that I'm supposed to relax and "lay low"

I feel like I'm back at the beginning again-like when my dad first died and I was really marginally functioning. It's very discouraging. I had really gotten to where I was feeling more normal and now I'm back to being out to lunch and having trouble getting anything done. But here I am...and not supposed to be going much of anywhere.

I've never had an an MRI - do you need someone to take you there, like for a surgery?

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I don't think so except if you're not supposed to drive much...

I know it's hard to swallow this happening when you least need it, but I hope you'll take some time to rest, at least until they find out what's going on.  Maybe practice your music or read...we were talking on another thread about how good it is to watch comedies, maybe you can rent one.

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