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  2. I loved "The Help" and also "Green Book" and think, that is how we treated people and Latino lives matter, hard to say Native Americans mattered, we just stomped them down. I wanted to have Native American in my DNA so I would not feel so guilty for my ancestors. Damn it, it was the ancestors, not me. My granddaughter is totally "woke" and I still drag my 1940-50-60's behind around with me. My people need to learn tolerance, but you know what? They think they are right and everyone else is wrong. I don't think that is just a problem for the "hillbilly" people though.. Lots of people hav
  3. See? More examples of a whole different lifestyle. I thought The Help was an excellent movie and was appalled how those women were treated. In New Mexico I’m sure there were housekeepers, but it was Latino, not blacks. Such different times. I’ve noticed I repeat myself often too. I've noticed I repeat myself often too. 🤪
  4. I got a beagle in tricolor but someone took it from my garage and never came back put be in so much grief. Now thinking what if I own a new one and one day the same thing will be happening. I can't bear. Maria Gracia.
  5. I think I live among a bunch of people who don't think about where we came from. I did mention one of my friends read the book "Hillbilly Elegy" by a lawyer named C.D. Vance. It is being made into a movie. I just have a hard time with people getting so upset for people getting government assistance when I grew up in the time of "The Help." It bothers me to hear people complain about helping these people, they consider lazy, when they probably never paid a cent into SS (for these people) for the many years they worked. I did not go to mixed schools. The "Hillbilly" is just a synonym for m
  6. I got a donated cookie at a church food program from one of the primo downtown restaurants. It’s chocolate chip and almost a meal itself. Broke it into 4 pieces for 4 desserts. If you’re an M&M addict like me, check out the fudge brownie new ones. They give my fav dark chocolate ones a run for the money. Love the caramel ones too. Wish they would do coconut, but I guess they’re too small for that.
  7. I’m always interested reading your families stories, Marg. You lived in a whole different world than I did. I was so young when a lot of my family's dramas were playing out. But I was involved in a few. One hiding an aunt from my abusive uncle. She got liquor delivered (she was an alcoholic like several of my relatives) somehow and was unresponsive one morning. Had to call 911 and my cousins back east. I was glad to get away from the drama. Only stayed in contact with the sane members of my relatives. Spent most of the afternoon on my insurance. It was like playing whack-a-mole.
  8. Yesterday
  9. Every month, nearly every day I get some new insurance suggestion. If it has OGB anywhere on it, I open it. Twice a year I call Blue Cross and OGB. I have the "Magnolia plan" which is supposed to be the best, but damned if I know what it is. The only thing I do know, if I ever get rid of OGB, I can never get it back. Each time I call, they tell me I'm okay, I do not need to call, but I get so much mail, so many phone calls. I have been affiliated with OGB (Office of Group Benefits) since 1959. So, I try to ignore everything. My four drugs come to less than $20 for three months, two are
  10. Thanks. I really kind of regret not having friends now, but I never wanted to hang out with anyone else. When I needed to be alone, I listened to music and she did her thing. When I had enough "me" time, it was only Annette I ever needed. We had a lifetime of shared likes and in-jokes and I miss that so much it's unbearable. Without my identity as her caregiver, I just have no purpose. I got a part-time job when she could no longer work, but with being prone to panic attacks and social anxiety, the only way I got through was her voicemails every hour. I don't know how I can get a job again wit
  11. I wonder if I let my back go too long that anything will significantly help. Along with the regular pain he’ll, it feels like sciatica has kicked in too. over the counter and.CBD aren’t big guns enough in our situations. I know you were going to a sooner than later assessment. Did you get a possible surgery date? Back on the phone for me with insurance and RX messes. My rep couldn’t help at all. Haven’t heard from my shrink on new meds tho the logic of existing ones still eludes me. I’ve been doubled billed too. Customer service is a joke as it’s a different story every time. W
  12. I too am sorry for your loss. I understand the pain is still there even though it was in 2014. I believe we never get over the loss of someone that was so important in our life. The special dates on the calendars only remind us how much they really meant to us. I lost my husband in 2015 and the pain I feel today still feels like it was just yesterday. My heart goes out to you as you walk this grief path, just please know, you are not alone. Dee
  13. kayc: I hear you. Shortly after my husband passed away, probably less than two months one of my dearest friends passed away. I have missed her so much and wouldn't even know how to make another old friend at my age. For me, a friendship has to be a two way street and takes years to grow into trust and caring for each other. Just as you say about George and Arlie, my Bob and my Maddie and my friend were one of a kind. In the meantime, I do treasure the casual friends in my neighborhood that let me know they are here if I need them. But, since their lives are busy with families and thei
  14. What I've learned is you can buy a generlink on line www.generlink.com and you have a generator (you'd want to make sure it's big enough to suit your needs, they usually have a calculator for that maybe on your elec. site? Then call your electric company to hook it up, ours doesn't charge. It goes through the meter box. No more cords except plugging the cable into your meter box. No more snaking! Don't let it bother you, we all seem to redistribute as we age. My waist is bigger than it was last time I weighed this amount! I wouldn't either! I'd love it if all I had to wor
  15. Wow, that is a lot at once! I will definitely keep you in my thoughts and prayers in December especially! True. My best friend after my husband died moved to TX a few years ago, I have not been able to find anyone like her again, just as I have not found anyone like my George (husband) or Arlie (dog), they don't exist as they were all one of a kind, unique, irreplaceable.
  16. II'm so sorry for your loss. I understand, anniversaries and anv. of death are very tough to get through. Sometimes it feels a lifetime ago (15 years) and I wonder, was he ever really here with me? But I have my memories, and yes, he existed, our life existed.
  17. I meant to give you this article yesterday... https://www.griefhealingblog.com/2013/10/how-we-mourn-understanding-our.html I hope you get some justice for your mom!
  18. There is, but it took me years to process my husband's death (unexpected and way too young), years more to find purpose, and more years yet to build a life I could live again. I want to share an article with you that I wrote of the things I've found helpful over the years: TIPS TO MAKE YOUR WAY THROUGH GRIEF There's no way to sum up how to go on in a simple easy answer, but I encourage you to read the other threads here, little by little you will learn how to make your way through this. I do want to give you some pointers though, of some things I've learned on my journey. Tak
  19. I hope you can set aside some time every day for YOURSELF to study, review in preparation for your test. Your dad is not the only one that matters, you do too! Peggy told me on my way out the door yesterday that she wanted to wait until today to go pick up his ashes and death certificates so it looks like I'll be gone all day today again, getting exhausted and will be gone the next six days in a row, I find I need to be home every other day as it's exhausting to be on the go this much and I need time to cook, etc. I got my house cleaned except for the dusting but have to order a generli
  20. Thank you for sharing this entire post, very wonderful and I'm sure it's of immense help. I'm sorry you also lost your dog, I lost mine 13 months ago and I'll never be over him or stop loving him, he's in my heart each and every day and I miss my soulmate in a dog, Arlie. I, too, can relate to your post.
  21. I'm sorry your friends responded so inappropriately. People often don't know what to say or how to respond and come out with the most ludicrous things. I would respond, I appreciate your concern but that invalidates my valid feelings of grief. It will take time for me to process this and ALWAYS I will love my cat/s. I am so sorry for your loss and all you are going through with it. I think Marty's quote of the Serenity Prayer is good, I know it's sometimes easier said than done. I wish for you some justice and comfort ahead.
  22. The other ones are "You can't miss it" with respect to driving directions. Supremely aggravating, the last thing you need to be dealing with. Cynically, I suspect this type of confusion and chaos is deliberate, to drive people crazy.
  23. Arg! This Medicare thing is consuming my life! Premera billed my credit card for a full payment and I have never paid them on that. It’s supposed to be from checking. Looking at that it is cancelled but the new rate for November is scheduled. So I’ve paid for both plans. Left numerous messages for my rep about what the heck is going on. Found out I have to get my shrink to send in new anxiety meds as they are 'controlled substances'. Being in worse pain I’m losing my mind with this. I went to Walgreens to pick up a partial RX and thought I might not make it. Doc is breathing down my
  24. Your words speak volumes. Especially about new old friends. So very true. Having run into new people since Steve died and my old friends disappeared, nothing has really stuck. They often have their own old friends already. I’m not an age that has much time to invest into a long standing history. We’d like to think new people will be close quickly, but that’s not how it works. I so miss the people that shared much of my life. I like meeting new people and learning about them. How deep that can go is iffy. I keep trying and that is about all we can do without getting obsessed about it.
  25. Welcome, James, and sorry to read what you had endured. Kidney disease/ESRD is probably one of the worst afflictions out there. My partner lived with it for 14 years but eventually it wore him down. As you say, those last few months... I can kind of understand thinking about someone new. Loneliness is certainly a real thing and it's a human and very natural thing to want company. When I talked to a therapist about it a few years ago, she had the view that it was understandable, although possibly more of a "guy thing." I think she said further that men who are widowed sometimes remar
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