MyLoveBrian You are doing better than I was after the death of youi Brian. I wasn't able to talk about my feelings or even express my dispair for almost 6 months. It was just too painful. At least you express your raw emotions this soon and i think that is good. I know you feel cheated that he was taken from you at a time when you were looking forward to such wonderful events ahead of you. I am so sorry for your loss and can only tell you that in the months ahead, the heartache will ease some. It will never go away but, somehow, you learn to live with it. Diann