father's daughter

Today, my husband, my son and I went to fix some things in my mom's house. My husband trimmed the hedges, fixed some plumbing and mowed the lawn. But I was a complete wreck. I've been to see my mom every day since dad passed but today seemed very difficult, though. I could feel my dad everywhere. My mom has his pictures everywhere and I found it really sad. It was like he was looking at me from every corner but I couldn't touch him, couldn't speak to him. My mom was also extremely sad today. I tried to give her all the support I could but how do you help a grieving person when you need help yourself?

Dear Shauna, All my life I've been involved in alternative medicine. As I read about your infections and antibiotics, I would like to suggest you try to take some probiotics. Without going into details, they balance your intestinal flora and thus help to combat infections. (Antibiotics destroy the good flora) You can buy them anywhere - any pharmacy and they are not expensive. You should take them 2-3 hours apart from your other mediations. It might take a while for them to kick in but you will be surprised how much better you'll feel. Father's Daughter

I'm sooo sorry to read about your life, Shauna. And I'm soooo sorry about the pressure your mom put on you. It wasn't and isn't fair that your family didn't step in! You must be a really strong person to endure all of that. My dad used to say: "Unfortunately, you cannot choose your parents." but you can choose your life. I know, it's easier said than done. I'm struggling with it myself right now...

My father passed away last week at the age of 74. Although he had a heart condition, he died on sepsis that supposedly started by his toxic liver from his heart medication and shut down his kidneys and eventually heart. I'm having a difficult time to adjust. I see his death as something that didn't have to happen if doctors were more careful or were moving much faster in the emergency. I blame myself that I underestimated his condition and didn't push harder at the emergency. I loved and love my dad very much and now I'm worried about my mom. My parents were married 51 years and were very dependent on each other. Because of my dad's heart condition, they were doing everything together. I have 2 1/2 old son and a husband so I know I should devote my attention to them but what about my mom? My story is even more complicated by the fact that we immigrated to this country together and that because I spoke English, the roles partially reversed. I would take care of most of my parents' affairs in English. Now my mom doesn't drive and the easiest would be to bring her to our home. My grandmother is still alive although in a state of dementia and she lives my mom. My dad used to tell me that if something happened to either of them that I was not to take the second one in. That it would ruin my life. I'm also pondering about the reason why we are here if we should live with a grief and sorrow for the rest of our lives.