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Grief Healing Discussion Groups

Peggy1617

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    4
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  • Date of Death
    12/20/2008
  • Name/Location of Hospice if they were involved:
    na

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  • Your gender
    Female
  1. I understand exactly what you are going through. I lost may husband two months ago. I couldn't eat, sleep, or even think. I thought I was losing my mind. I would sit and cry and just want to die so that I could be with Rich. I am currently seeing a grief counselor every week. I joined a gym to get out of the house and occupy my mind an try to tire myself out. I still cry and sometimes I am back to where I was two months ago. The other night I had nightmares and had no one to comfort or protect me. I do have some friends that will lend a should to cry on and try to comfort me but they have not experienced what we have been through. This website has others that have and will provide the understanding and support that you need. Take care, Peggy
  2. Yesterday would have been my 39th anniversary. I spent most of the day crying. I feel so alone. My family and friends did not know what to say or do. They felt that by not mentioning it, it would make it easier for me. I felt that by not mentioning it they were ignoring that it was our day. Does anyone have any ideas of what we could have done to acknowledge the day without making anyone uncomfortable?
  3. Jeanne, Lily,Fred, and Wendy, Thank you for letting me part of this special group and for all the support and encouragement at this time in my life. It is comforting to know that you are able to help and support others after what you have all been through. I can only hope that I will be able to provide that support to others in the future. Peggy
  4. I met my husband Rich when I was 14. He told my parents that he was going to marry me one day. We met up again when I was 17 1/2 and eloped after I turned 18. Everyone said our marriage would not last. We had our son and while pregnant with my daughter my husband had emergency surgery in 1975. He had Crohn's disease. The doctors put him on medication and said he had maybe 5-10 years to live. My husband being the fighter he was amazed the doctors all the time with his determination to stay alive. He was on medication and was constantly in pain. The disease played havoc with his body. He was always making everyone laugh. He kept active and worked through the pain. He was always there for his family and friends. If someone needed a hand whether a friend or stranger he was there. In December he was having trouble keeping food down. He went to his primary care physician on 12/17. He gave him penicillin and sent him home. On 12/18 he wasn't hungry but I made him something light when I came home from work. On 12/19 we were getting a snow storm so he drove me to work. I called him in the afternoon (like I always do) and he said the he vomited and my daughter would pick me up. I didn't want to go to the hospital because he thought he had the flu. On 12/20 he was still throwing up and decided to go to the hospital. At the hospital they determined that he had a blockage due to the Crohn's disease. He was operated on 12/22. He came through the surgery though he was week. My family and I were with him constantly. We brought our granddaughters to see him on Christmas Day. He was very tired. They had started him on a light diet. We were making plans for him to come home over the weekend. On 12/26 the hospital called and said that he was having problems breathing. I panicked. They said he was okay. My daughter and I went to the hospital. In the parking lot we were called and told that he had gone into cardiac arrest. They did get him back but he was in a coma. I rushed into the hospital and took one look and know he was gone. They ran all kinds of test and determined that he was brain dead. He had aspirated and not received oxygen for about 15 minutes. The doctors could not tell me what happened. They just said they didn't have any answers and couldn't tell me why. We let him go on 12/30. I am depressed and angry. I cry all the time and feel that I am losing my mind. My heart is broken. We would celebrate our 39th anniversary on 2/21. February is a very sad month between my birthday, anniversary, and Valentine's Day. I feel so alone. I have been told life goes on and I have to move forward. How do I move forward? I can't eat or sleep. I feel such a burden to my family and friends. I just want to be with Rich.
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