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Grief Healing Discussion Groups

ksugino1

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  • Date of Death
    2/26/09
  • Name/Location of Hospice if they were involved:
    NA
  1. so i had something weird happen earlier this week, i was talking to a friend about something else ( non sunny dieing related)and somehow we got to talking about sunny dieing, and she told me that another friend of ours lost her dogs ( i already knew that) but it was worse because that particular person is not able to have kids. i wanted to punch my friend in the face for saying that. its like it didn't matter to her that i hurt over my dog because i can physically have kids. keep in mind the fact that i don't want kids, never have. i would much rather have dogs. but when she said that i felt my heart shatter all over again. and i also felt more isolated and alone than i had in my life. is that normal for me to feel this way over that?
  2. got it, i replied too.
  3. does anyone living in the phoenix metropolitan area know of any good grief counselors, especially in the area of pet loss. it has been almost 3 months since sunny left me, i am still a mess, i cry pretty much daily, i get migraines pretty close to daily, and am barely functioning. i googled it, but didnt see very many. i am not sure if they are good or not either, any input would be good. thanks-kimi p.s. if you want to know more of how i think i am struggling, just ask i will explain
  4. ok here is the update. i emailed my friends the link, i said what you said marty. so far no one has asked me about it. i am hoping i didnt upset them or anything. i also know eveyone is really busy right now. so we will see. i am still feeling pretty crappy though, i am getting migraines 5 days out of 7 ( i tracked it last week) my appetite is good, and i am either oversleeping or undersleeping. i can't find a happy medium.. i cry for no apparent reason and really miss sunny. one thing i read was not to grieve alone. after the first two days i have been grieving alone. i am not sure if that is good or not. another thing i read was to talk about the death and my dog. i haven't done that either... i wonder if that is why i am having such a hard time coping.....
  5. thanks marty for the input.. i will figure out what i am doing and update you all later on...
  6. thanks marty i went and checked it out, a lot of it sounds like me right now. my friends are still not real understanding, they think i dwell on my dog dieing. i don't know how to nicely show them a webiste i found, or one of your's marty to help me better. whats a good way to show them how to help me without offending/upsetting them?
  7. i am so sorry to hear that shelley ((hugs))
  8. i know how you feel. my faith has been completely shaken, and at times i feel god has left me... of course most of my church friends dont understand why i feel the way i do so i can relate to having to hold it in around people. ((maryann)) just remember you are in a place with people who love and care about you a lot. and dont feel bad still crying almost a week later. my dog was put down a little over 2 months ago and i still cry over it, all the time too
  9. i will check it out next month then. i would love to go today but i already made the plans to go to the school and make up work i missed tuesday night. can grief cause a person to get really bad headaches, either tension headaches or migraines? i have been getting bad headaches almost every other day, and i always want to puke because of them...
  10. thanks guys, i was aware of the support group meeting tomorrow, its about 40 minutes away from my house, but i have to go to school tomorrow to make up some work i missed tuesday night. i will look for books and stuff. i found one website that is really good, but i dont know how to send the link to my friends and tell them that is how to help me, i have tried telling them nicely not to tell me what to feel and when is the proper "time" to be over it, but we will see. i will check out those links also marty, is there any other groups that meet besides the one tomorrow?
  11. i feel like a fialure because my friends can't understand why i am still depressed about it two months after it happend, neither can my mom, i know they all mean welll when they tell me to get over it and whatever but it feels like they are all stabbing me with really sharp jagged knives when they say stuff liek that. i know that they don't like watching me be depressed/moody but i figured it was part of the process of grief. i just feel like in a weird way i am pushing my friends away, by my wanting to isolate, which is triggered by the statesments mentioned above, about jsut getting over it, just letting it go, etc. i have a good friend who i sat at her house the night sunny was put down, i think she saw me cry over the same thign more than once, and then the day after i was at her house crying all day... but its like the frist couple of days is over and i am supposed to be back to normal. i had someone tell me that grief was only a 3-4 day thing, i think if i could have flames in my eyes from anger that would ahve been it. i dunno, since the mainstream of everyone i know is saying be done with it, and over it ( paraphrased) and i am not, i feel like i am failing them, of course i havent been able to say to them i need a hug/need to be held either, i start talking and two words into my rant they tell me what thye think i need to do, and i am still upset and then feeling like an even bigger screw up. its really hard for me at night, because sunny slept in my room every night for the last 5 years, and when she was put down i was the one holding her head. last wednsday i had to take my greyhound to the vet to get her nails trimmed and jsut out of luck or what not we had to go in the same room that sunny was put down in , of course my mind got flooded with visions of that day again, and so my mom told me i liked to be miserable because i got home locked myself in my room and cried about it. she wnet but stayed in the waiting room, which was hard also, but not as hard as being in the room. thanks for the advice on not being crazy though, i just feel like i am collapsing and going insane because of this. hugs from AZ -kimi
  12. i have another dog, patches, she is a greyhound saluki mix. she looks so sad all the time but my mom says she is happy. thx for the hug. i figured i was going crazy with the way my body is acting and how i am acting. o well at least its nice to know that i am not the only one
  13. hello, i am new to this board. febuaray 26 i had to put my jack-russel terrier, sunny who i have had for 13 years down. she was my child. i remember the week it happend i was a mess, two of my friends sat and comforted me up till sunny's departure and after, we had to put her down, her kidneys were failing her, no appetite , basically looked miserable. anyways tomorrow is the two month aniversary, i still cry myself to sleep. i was doing better until easter and then i backtracked to square one again ( no clue why either) i have very little appetite myself ( i eat one meal a day) my caffine consumption has gone thru the roof ( i used to drink 1-2 cans a coke a day, now i am up to 6) i dotn want to be around people, i wish i would have died with my dog, and my friends are driving me nuts, ever since sunny died they all tell me i need to act a way, do this, do that. i should be over it by now, etc. the list keeps going on, when i hear those things and can't do them, i feel like a failure as a friend, i feel like i am letting them down. it hurts for me to breath 90% of the time also. all i want to do is cry my eyes out, which i do quite frequently, its weird there are moments wehre i am ok, but then pain hits me from the side and all i do is curl up and cry. i also tired of failing my friends since i can't cope in the way they think i need to. i feel so alone in this world because of it. i jsut want to be held and comforted, i am not expecting them to know why i am feeling the way i am,or to fully understand the pain. just comforting me is a way of expressing that they are there. but i dont know how to tell them that. my mom told me the other night to just " get over it" and the pain from that was so bad i was hoping she would just pull out a knife and stab me instead. anyways enough babbling from me now. am i going crazy?
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