Today I picked up my husbands cremated remains from the mortuary and then it hit me, I will never hold his hand, give him a good morning kiss, tell him I love him or feel his strong arms wrapped around me. So many wonderful things I will never get to feel again. He was only 31 and I ask why? Why my 2 year daughter won't ever get to have her daddy take her to school, watch her dance recitals, graduations, teacher he how to drive or walk her down the isle. I never loved anyone the way that I loved him and I was able to spend 10 amazing years as his wife but that doesn't seem to have been eough, nothing ever seemed to be enough. I wish I told him I love you more, I wish I told him how much he ment to me. Yesterday was the 4th week without him, I find myself counting the time that passes by at the 1st week he was gone, the 2nd week, 3rd and so on. I guess I will continue to count until I lose track....
