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Dlynn58, I am sorry for your loss. I was in the room when my mom passed away. The paramedics were working with her when her heart stopped. For a long time that was the image in my head and all I could focus on. It's almost seven months now and the image is not the dominant one. Instead I have happier memories that come to mind when I think of my mom, which is most of the day.

I got some good news yesterday and the first thing I did was reach for the phone to tell my mom. I hate not being able to share the good and bad parts of my day with her.

Babypod, Erin I have put my mother's brush away. It is the only physical piece I have left of her. The ashes were scattered on a beach that she loved. That was hard to do but I have been trying to do what she wanted me to do. I go back there when I need to be near her. Physically my mom has gone but there is so much of her in me and she will always be a part of my life. I hear her all the time in my head especially when I do something stupid. She could be really vocal in her opinions.

Thank you. I feel better knowing that I am not alone in what I am going through. *HUGS*

It's exactly six months since I lost my mom and it feels like it was just yesterday that it happened. I have been drifting along since then with no direction or purpose. My mom and I did everything together and all future plans included my mom. It still feels unreal to me and I haven't been able to fully accept it. I just go through the motions each day.

I have a long list of things that I wish I had said to my mom, things that she wanted to do and we never got around to because I was working long hours. I wish I could have known how sick she was that day and maybe she would still be here. I know hindsight is 20/20 vision but that doesn't make it easier.

It's been 5 months since my mom passed away and I still can't fully accept that she's gone. It feels like a nightmare that I never wake up from. I miss her so much.

I lost my mom 9 weeks ago. She lived with me for 10 years. I miss her every single minute of every day. I fall apart a lot but I get up again because my mom would not want me to give up. I miss talking to her and sharing my day with her. I write to her in my journal every day. I tell her everything about my day, how I am feeling and how I am struggling to cope. It's been a huge help to me.

March has arrived and in 10 days time it will be my first birthday without my mom as well as the day we will scatter her ashes. My mom was always adamant that her ashes should not be kept. She would tell me that she would haunt me if I kept them. I know that if I didn't ask for it as my birthday present, the ashes would never be scattered. I don't want to do it on my own, it has to be done by both my brother and I. I can't stop crying every time I think of scattering the ashes and I can't stop thinking about it. I want to do what my mom wanted but this makes it feel so final. Now she will really be gone.

I keep hoping for some sign that my mom is okay and so far, nothing. I sometimes wonder if there has been something and I've missed it.

I don't think it's crazy to want to see a sign. I lost my mom 7 weeks ago and I keep looking for a sign too. I need to know that she's okay.

Thank you everyone. You have all helped me a lot. I am going to wait until it feels right and I am ready.

My Mom lived with me for the last 10 years. She passed away on the 22 December 2010. I haven’t been able to move or pack away any of her stuff. It’s still her things. It makes it feel like she’s gone away for few days and she’s coming back. Some people tell me to sort out Mom’s things as soon as possible, others tell me to do it when I am ready. I don’t know what to do.