Hello CJ,
I feel the same way you do about your Boo Bear. There's never enough time with them. Even though life with my Mags was challenging, she was so worth it. She was a gift from my sister, and I got her at 12 weeks. I was conflicted about bringing a puppy into the house because I had a black lab, Annie who was 12 at the time, and I was worried that it would be too stressful for her. As it turned out Maggie thought Annie was a rock star, and it breathed new life into my old girl. Maggie grew into a beautiful, active, sweet girl and was my constant companion. She developed Megaesophagus just before her 4th birthday, and my vet suggested putting her down at that time. I learned how to manage it for the first year, built a special chair she sat in to eat. All her food went thru the blender, and she fought thru several bouts of aspiration pneumonia. She developed pockets in her esophagus, so food couldn't get to her stomach. Everything I fed her came up, and her weight was down over 20 pounds. Her last chance was a feeding tube. That was not without it's problems, but it worked, and she gained back all her weight and was able to live like a normal dog, except for the way she ate. She was tube fed 3 times a day. Now that she is gone, I feel at loose ends because I've structured my day around her schedule for so long, either feeding her myself or making sure someone else was there to take care of her. I feel good that at least I've found someone else who has a dog with similar circumstances who can take her leftover meds and syringes and her special chair.