loveyoupapi

I lost my father on 7-5-2006. I too had to be the strong one for my mother and I am just starting to mourn. Everything seems so different these days and I cannot seem to come to terms with this. I have never lost anyone close to me, and at 35 that is rare. When I am working I get teary eyed. When I do sleep it is a battle of nightmares, and when I manage a couple of hours, I wake up crying. I am not one to show others my emotions, so I do most of this once I am alone at home or at work where I am locked in my office. I am the only child, and have to now keep my mother together, as well as move her closer to me because I really would love to just sit in bed all day. My husband has been great, and my 10 year old seems to be dealing, whereas my 14 year old will not say the word. I recently visited the grave "what a terrible experience". Since it has been only 2 1/2 weeks, it was bare awaiting the head stone. That made it so much worse. I feel for you and others who like me are lost without that person. Thanks for sharing your thoughts.