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Monica010

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Everything posted by Monica010

  1. I checked out of this site for a few days while with my family for Thanksgiving. I survived. Lisa - I hope you had as good a Thanksgiving as possible, and found more comfort than frustration with your family. I was very happy to be with my family, though I got the distinct impression that everyone else was doing better than I am. Only four of my nine siblings were in town, and we didn't talk at all about how we're "coping", but it was just nice to be with people who were dealing with exactly the same thing. It was nice to hear about my dad from someone other than me. No one "dwelled" on Dad, but he was mentioned frequently- it felt natural. I'm grateful for that. I'm terribly sorry to hear that you feel the local grief support group is not a place you'll be comfortable. I hope you'll keep looking for other options, and certainly hope this site is helpful to you. I'm so happy to hear that you have a strong support network with your husband and friends, but I also understand that you're feeling this loss constantly, and don't want to feel like a constant "burden." I agree, the shower is a superb place for a good long sob-fest. I take advantage daily. Hang in there... please keep posting if the conversation if helpful. You're in my thoughts.
  2. Marty and Ron- your words are kind and helpful... Thank you. I hope you, LisaAnnB, have also found some comfort. I'm on a plane about to head "home" for my the first Thanksgiving without Dad. I'm scared. Can't wait to see my mom, but also afraid I won't be able to keep it together for her. (Also feel terrible for the poor guy who has to sit next to me!). More to come, I'm sure... LisaAnnB, and all others having a "first" today... Good luck!
  3. Hi LisaAnnB, I'm also new to the site, yours is the first post I've read... My dad died on Oct 9, with mom by his side and much family nearby. The circumstances of his passing were by all accounts ideal: he was eighty, had his wife and family, had no pain, and went peacefully. For all that, I'm grateful. However, it does nothing to change the overwhelming and sometimes paralyzingly pain of loss. I wish I could offer great advice, but I'm still trying to figure it out myself. I can only offer condolences and confirmation that what you're feeling sounds completely normal to me. A month and a half out, I'm not feeling much different or better than when it was brand new. I have finally looked into grief support groups (though can't find anything that begins before January!), and I found this site. All I can recommend is that you hold onto your mom, and sisters, and husband; understand that this is supposed to be difficult (wouldn't you be more concerned if you felt ok?); seek out the support you may need; and be kind to yourself. I'm pretty terrified of Thanksgiving and Christmas, and up 'til now the best I've been able to do is work on the gratitude... I'm truly thankful to have had a dad so worthy of missing this much. I'm glad to hear you had the same. Keep putting one foot in front of the other...
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