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Galelucille

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Everything posted by Galelucille

  1. Oh, my. "I have always loved solitude. Now I do not have someone to do nothing with. I miss that so much." I relate to this with every fiber of my being. Before he died, I felt so terribly sad for him. Now I feel sorry for myself and want to rise above that. Some days I am fairly successful to the extent of reaching out to others and somewhat effectively picking up the routine/responsibilities of life. And then it seems to be back to square one. My head knows this is normal. Yet, today, right now, I am in more pain than anytime since he died three months ago. I am 80 years of age so life has dealt some suffering to me. But nothing - not even everything added up - equals this. Having said that, my tears have abated. I will read some old love letters and draw him close to me. Those are the moments when I feel most happy now. A friend, who is a widow, thinks this is not good for me. I am interested to know how others have fared with this type of bereavement behavior.
  2. It can go both ways, at least in my situation. My husband died five weeks ago. My two brothers, who had ignored us for several years, called when they heard of his death. (I just wish my darling could know they have been in touch. He was their big brother for 60 years.) What really gets me, though, is that my husband's ONLY relative (beyond his children, etc.) is a half brother who has not made contact with me even though our son called him five minutes after the death. I'm working myself toward contacting him because just maybe my husband would have wanted that. I have been shocked by the behavior of one woman who has actually attacked me three times related to the fact that I did not personally notify her of the stages of Dick's illness and death (hospitalizations, palliative care, Hospice). And then she told several of my friends that I did not want phone calls! I need help to deal with this in a way that leads me to letting go of it. Okay. Those are my gripes. I am reaching out, a little at a time, to fill my empty hours with being useful to others who need attention. I have learned a lot about that already.
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