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About scba

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  • Your relationship to the individual who died
    my boyfriend
  • Date of Death
  • Name/Location of Hospice if they were involved:

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  1. “Because they’d been to the top of the mountain, and they just knew in their heart they’d never get there again, that it was never going to get — never going to be that way ever again."
  2. I want to sit down and cry until no tears are left. I miss you so much. I need you so much. Where are you?
  3. Probably because I'm scare to loose the few people that still contact me from time to time. This is already a lonely place.
  4. I need to express the following. I have notice that I purposely avoid to tell friends (who are not in contact with me often) about my life. I have regular contact with two friends. With others, quite occasionally (and mostly by chat). With these I really divert conversation to talk about them cause I feel that I have nothing much happy or positive to say about the big categories of life. People stopped asking at around year 2/3 and I stopped talking about it. I find it is very hard for me to reveal how my life really is now. I don't tell lies, I just can't talk about it. I can't tell them the truth. Does it happen to you too?
  5. I'm so sorry Kay for your dog. I shed tears when I read about it. You will be in our thoughts tomorrow
  6. I am in this with you Gwen. He wouldn't recognize me. He would ask: what my death have done to you? I have seen that what in his father. You can see what is imprinted right in his lifeless eyes.
  7. Have you heard from her? I hope she and kids are ok.
  8. Hello, I'm sorry about your brother's loss and the issues you and your family are dealing with. It's very, very, very difficult for us bereavers to understand and comprehend that life does go on. people eventually go back to their lives. It is not automatically. But one day you realise of it and you are thrown to the deepest of loneliness and aloneness. It is not a nice place to be. I'm not justifying your brother, I'm sharing my experience. Grief is a horrible experience to go through, no sugar coating in this. However, as much pain we are in, as much desperately we may be, we are entitled of nothing more than kindness and compassion and companionship. And help as far as people are able to, in a healthy way. Our pain doesn't make us to be the center of others universe. This is unrealistic, and it is not healthy. It might be still early to him to take an initiative and do something with his spare time, like hobbies or distraction. I took two years off work and spent a year blocked at home. I was in a lot of pain. It clouded my whole existence. If you feel you have done all you could, repeat him that you trust that time and counselling will help him. That you will support him. Empower him with your trust in that. I remember I needed that. Apart from surfing Marty webpage, she has lots of good resources, I suggest you to Google Megan Devine. She also has lots of advise about how to support a bereaved. This is a very complex issue.
  9. It's my turn. Today is our anniversary. 4 years together against 5 years only me. I feel so much pain right now that I can't remember how we celebrated. I will survive today, just don't know how. My heart is breaking in million pieces of glass, and I'm walking barefoot.
  10. Keanu Reeves: ‘Grief and loss, those things don’t ever go away’ "In 1999, his long-term girlfriend, Jennifer Syme, gave birth to their daughter Ava, who was stillborn. The couple broke up soon after, and two years later Syme was killed in a car accident. He has also never spoken publicly about their deaths, and who can blame him? But given that the heart of the Wick films is about him mourning a lost love, the resonance is hard to ignore. "What is it about grief that interests him? “Well, for the character and in life, it’s about the love of the person you’re grieving for, and any time you can keep company with that fire, it is warm. I absolutely relate to that, and I don’t think you ever work through it. Grief and loss, those are things that don’t ever go away. They stay with you.” Has he been thinking more about the people he has lost as he’s grown older? “I don’t think it’s about getting older. It’s always with you, but like an ebb and flow,” he says".
  11. JTP, I can see myself in each word you wrote. I lost my boyfriend in 2014. This is THE place of caring and understanding. Grief is a lonely place, but not here. Ana
  12. I get it too. I have felt the same in my last 5th birthdays. It`s a horrible calendar day that bring me anxiety and sadness. We understand you. I wish you peace today. Ana
  13. I feel the same. These have been the worst years of my life and nothing, really nothing, can ammend that. It gets softer, but this softness cannot erase or cancel what these years have been to me. Life goes on. I`m scared of it and at the same time I feel I cannot fear anything else. I`ve been killed and have been left alive. Peace. Ana.
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