chivon

That is a good idea to write all my feelings on paper because when I write I get relief. It will help with the process because holding it all inside has not helped me at all. i do feel l have been traumatized by this happening and It keeps replaying over and over in my mind.

I appreciate your words of comfort. I am trying really hard not to blame myself. My husband called for me and my daughter to get professional help last week. It has help to talk to someone and she really helped me understand that I should not blame myself for this accident. I have been having a hard time because the image keeps coming in my mind of what happened to him. I know he is no longer in pain anymore and that helps ease my mind. I miss him so much and everything reminds me of him. I find his fur on my clothes and it just makes me think of him more. My home is so different without him here. I know it will get better and I want another kitty but my husband thinks I am just trying to cover up my pain so that I do not have to deal with the grief. I just miss him so much.

I would comfort them and tell them they are not the blame. I have to tell this to myself everyday to get through this pain!!!

I appreciate your words of encouragement. This has been the hardest week of my life. My mind keeps going back to seeing him laying there. My husband set up an appointment for me and my daughter to go to therapy tonight. He doesn't like seeing me like this and wants the happy me back. It is just really hard to smile and be happy when my Bailey's life was taken away so soon. I am just taking one day at a time.

My name is Chivon Rodgers and on Monday morning I experienced the most traumatic experience of my life. I have a cat named Bailey who I got when he was about 6 weeks old. I loved him the moment I laid eyes on him. We had an amazing bond. He would always find his way to be around me and he followed me every where that I went. We both enjoyed cuddle time and he always loved laying on my chest suckling my ear. On Sunday night it was the same thing with us. He followed me around all night. He lay on top of my chest and we cuddled for a long time. It had been a long day and I was tired so I decided to take a bath to wind down for the night.. He always came in the bathroom and lay by the tub. After I was done I had to go put my daughters school uniform in the dryer that I had washed for the next day. Bailey followed me in the basement as always. We played for a bit as he ran around the basement, running and jumping. I went in the washer to get my daughters uniform and put it in the dryer and it was only a shirt and a pair of pants. I put it in the dryer and cleaned out the lent trap and turned the dryer on. I then went upstairs and went to bed. I thought to myself it was strange that Bailey didn't follow me up but I thought maybe he got tired and went to sleep from all of the running and jumping. I forgot to mentioned that he is now six months old so I had him for a while now. The next day I woke up On Monday morning around 7:45 to get my daughters uniform out of the dryer and get ready for school. I opened the dryer and pulled her pants out and it had rad stains all over it. I thought maybe she had something in her pocket and it got all of her clothes. Then I looked at the dryer door and it was red stains all over it. I was still confused to what this was so as I was reaching in the dryer to get her shirt, I saw the most traumatic thing of my life. I looked in disbelief and saw my Kitty laying in the dryer lifeless and blood splattered everywhere. I screamed at the time of my lungs No over and over again. I kept saying my baby my baby!!! I ran upstairs and my screams had woken my husband and daughter up. I cried Bailey is dead, he got in the dryer!!! I didn't see him, how did he get in there? I am so confused because I never heard him get in the dryer and he never done that before. My heart hurts so bad because how did I not see my Kitty get in the dyer. How did I not hear him when I only put two things in the dryer. It breaks my heart that I couldn't save my baby!!! I cant get the thoughts out of my mind of the pain that he endured that night while I slept. My baby was hurting and I couldn't save his life. I am filled with guilt and blame myself because how did I not see my kitty. Everyone keeps telling me not to blame myself because I didn"t know but it hurts so bad because I turned on the dryer. I want to turn back the hands of time and make this nightmare go away. I want my Bailey back. I miss his cuddles, his purrs, and the way he stares me in my eyes with so much love. How could happen and how did I not see him in there. I been crying everyday and I cant get the image out of my head of him lying there. We were just playing together and now he is gone. Me and my daughter was the closet to him and she is taking it hard. It didn't want her to see him in there but she went and saw him anyway. Now she is going through what I am going through. She cant get it out of her mind and she has not been herself since. I cant go back in the basement and do laundry because that hurts me more. Everything reminds me of him and it hurts my heart so bad. I am devastated because I am suppose to be his protector and He is gone now and I couldn't save him. He had to suffer so bad that night and it hurts me that he had to endure such pain. I want him back and I cant believe he is gone. He was a part of our family and We loved him so much. I am hurting so bad!!!