missingcharlie

Hugs to you today, Kim!!! Crazy how fast time goes by, isn't it? I love the color yellow, too! Have the best day possible. Try to do something for yourself, today, too. Patti

AWWWWW!!! I love puppies!! Shadow looks so sweet - and I think it's a perfect name. Enjoy each other!! Loving animals is the best. I went from dogs to cats, after I lost Charlie. He wasn't very fond of cats, so we never had one - although I think he would like "my boys", Harley & Davidson. They require less attention than dogs and I'm gone alot. I love them... My best to you and Shadow, Mary Linda!!! Looks like a great match. Hugs, Patti

I LOVED that poem, Marty!!! Really makes you think and it's absolutely true. Sure hope, so far, that my dash has been going OK.... Hugs to all! Patti

Absolutely, WaltC - they will be sorely missed!!! RIP, Michael & Farrah!! Patti

Mossfire - We are here for you. We understand how you feel. It's been going on 5 years for me and I'M STILL HERE. I survived the worst thing that has ever happened in my life and I KNOW that is what my husband wanted for me. He wanted me to be strong and survive...it's not my time yet. He wants me to go on with MY life and enjoy the time I have left. That is what Rob wants for you, too. I don't know how long it's been for you - tell us your story. We are here to help you down this long journey. Hugs to you, Patti

Happy Birthday, Kathy!! Patti

Thank you ALL for the lovely comments!! They mean so much to me - it helps alot to know that all of you know exactly how I feel. I got to spend part of the day with my grandkids - we had a great time. I'm so glad that all of you are my "extended family"! Hugs to all of you!! Patti

Today Charlie and I would have been married 20 years. I'm sad knowing that we didn't get to spend all that time together, but I will get through the day as I know he would not want me to be sad all day. I still miss him so much - even after almost 5 years. I love you, Dear...I always will!! Happy, Happy 20th anniversary!! I wish we were celebrating together - I know it would have been a very special anniversary. You ALWAYS made them special. Thank you for being in my life! Patti

I guess I get to join the ranks of people who had wonderful Gemini's in their lives. My dearest, Charlie, was also a Gemini. His birthday was June 10th and he would have been 51. Tomorrow would have been our 20th wedding anniversary. I miss him so much!! I don't have a steady stream of tears, but I have been rather weepy these last few weeks. Seems to be getting to me, again.... Happy birthday, (again) Dear!!! And as always, Happy Anniversary (tomorrow)!! I love you, Dear - ALWAYS!!!! Happy birthday to George and to Jack, too. Patti

It sure does suck!!! I've had animals all my life and it sucks every time. After we lost our beloved dog, a year before Charlie passed, I vowed not have any more animals for a while (if ever). A couple of years ago some friends of mine talked me into getting my 2 kitties - they said I needed some company, that I should be alone. I love my boys, Harley and Davidson. Am dreading something happening to them - hopefully it won't be for a long time!!! I AM sorry for your loss, Mary Linda!! Hugs!!

As time goes on, things do get a little easier, but you will never stop missing him or wishing he was with you (physically). Why do you think, after going on 5 years, I still come here almost every day? I don't write much, but I'm always reading. I still need the comfort now and again. Hugs to all of you!!! Patti

I, too, understand about your financial issues! Just thinking the other day how much my life has changed in the past 4 1/2 years since I lost Charlie. I have pretty much lost everything - the house, my vehicle - I will be filing bankruptcy by the end of the year. Guess everyone has the "right" to file at some point in their lives and I guess it's my time. I live alone, too, (except for my 2 kitties) and I have actually gotten used to it. I also do not want a stranger living with me - I like my privacy. Just found out yesterday that the place I work for is closing another 2 of it's stores, which only leaves the one I manage and one other. Fortunately for me....I still have a job there. I do start to panic, at times, when I think about the fact that I could be laid off - have NO idea what I would do at that point (other than cry!) Guess I would be moving in with friends or a relative (that would be terrible). I think the worst part is that we don't have our loves to hold on to in these trying times. I miss my Charlie so much!!! This month on the 10th he would have been 51 and then the 17th we would have been married 20 years. Makes me so sad!! Everyone, take care!!! We can only do what we can do...... Hugs to all!!!! Patti

Just wanting to wish all of you Mom's a very Happy Mother's Day!!!!! From one mom to another - Hugs to all of you (even the guys...) Patti

Happy Birthday, Wendy!! Hope it's a special day. Hugs to you. Patti

That's wonderful, Teny!! Grandchildren are so precious. Enjoy her!! Congratulations! Hugs. Patti

I hope you have a very safe journey!! I apparently missed your original post of why you are going to the Rio Grande, but I think I have figured out, from other posts, that you are going to spread your loved ones ashes? Is that right? Once it is done, you will feel so good about it! I lost my husband in Nov. 2004. He wanted his ashes spread in a specific lake in CA (I live in AZ) - I needed my inlaws to go with me (they have the boat we needed to use). I wanted to do this around his birthday, which is in June, but couldn't get anyone to go with me in June 2005. To make a long story short, we all went in June of '06. It was LOVELY!! The weather couldn't have been nicer - things came together perfectly and we were all at peace once we had "released" them. I know he was pleased with the way the whole thing went!! I truly hope that your trip is as satisfying! Be safe!!! We will be thinking about you. I'm sure you will let us know how it went when you return. Hugs! Patti

I, too, was just sick to my stomach when I read the topic of your post, Teny!! I am so sorry for your loss. Sometimes it seems like we have so much to bear in our lives. You are in my thoughts, Teny. Hugs to you!! Patti

Guess it's time for us "old-sters" to come out.... Can't believe that all of us still come here and HAVE for as long as we have been. I don't post very much 'cause at times I have no idea what to say, but I still come and read. Maybe not every day, but when I am here I try to catch up with what has been going on. I think I might be the "oldest member", now. I passed 4 years in November. Parts of my life have moved on, but other parts have not. People ask me all the time if I'm dating - dating who?! Guess I'm not ready yet because I can't even PICTURE myself with anyone else. I've had a couple of men tell me that they would like to take me out - to a movie and dinner or something, but I can't even bring myself to do that. I think it boils down to me being afraid. Maybe I will meet someone, someday, that I can be friends with first and then the dating part might become easier. I don't know....every time I think about it I want to cry. I am glad that all of you ARE still here. I think we've become long distance friends and I look forward to seeing your names on here when I do logon. Sure is sad as to how many other people have "joined" us here!! I truly wish none of us had ever had to come here. I still miss my Charlie SO MUCH!! as I know ALL of you miss your loved ones as much!!!!! Good thing we have each other, huh? Hugs to all of you! Patti

Lisa - I understand what you are saying about the intimacy part....My wonderful husband, Charlie, passed away over 4 years ago and to this day I have not dated, then obviously not intimate, with anyone. I, too, have this terrible feeling of guilt when I think of "doing" anything with someone other than him. Even after this length of time, I STILL have no desire to be with anyone other than him. He would not be happy that I have these feelings....he loved me so much that all he wanted for me was to be happy and he hoped I found happiness again. Still looking for that..... Think I will just enjoy the happiness that my daughter, grandkids, friends and family give me. I am very blessed to have them all! Take care of yourself. Don't "move on" too quickly - one day at a time. Having lost Sergio ONLY a year ago - that's not a very long time. Things will improve! Hugs to all. Patti

I don't know how to add our names. If you could just make sure that Charlie and Patti are part of your list I would appreciate it so much!! I just started my 5th year without him and I miss him so much. Thanks. Hugs to all. AND Happy New Year!! Patti

Charlie and Patti

Heartbroken - We are VERY glad that you have found us. We absolutely are here to help you get through this. We all range in different times of loss - I'm thinking I might be the furthest along, at this point. I've now been without my beloved husband, Charlie, for just over 4 years. I CAN tell you that in time things will seem better, but for now just take one second at a time. When I was reading your post, it brought back memories. Charlie was diagnosed with cancer on September 27, 2004 and he was gone on November 16, 2004. He was 46 years old. As you said, we had no idea it would go that quickly. He, too, spent his last 25 days in ICU, but he was totally conscious and new everything that was happening until the last 2 days. (I would rather it have gone quickly than to see him suffer for a long time!) He, too, was absolutely the love of my life and my soulmate. As I said, it's been 4 years and I still can't bring myself to date anyone. I know that's what Charlie wants me to do because he told me he wanted me to find someone,someday, and be happy again - I just don't think I have it in me....I loved HIM and want to be with HIM, not someone else. My heart goes out to you. No one should have to go through this - just remember that there are others that are with you! US!!! As the others, here, have said - any time you need to talk or vent or comfort, we're here. Just keep coming here and we will all get through this together. Take care of yourself!! Hugs to you. Patti

Just now reading this post...sorry. My husband had an autoimmune disease known as systemic scleroderma (at one time he was tested for Lupus...) - he developed lung cancer since he had no immune system left and they did some chemo on him, but as they are talking about with Wendy's mom, they are not able to give them full strength chemo because it apparently can aggravate the current disease. Unfortunately, in his case, it did no good - in the short amount of time they had to administer the chemo. The GOOD news, for him, was that he passed away with all his hair! (Charlie's hair was very important to him and I've always been grateful that he didn't lose his hair and then pass away anyway..) I truly am keeping Wendy's mom in my thoughts and HOPE that things will go good for her!! Hugs to everyone!! Patti

Hugs and kisses are absolutely one of the things I miss most! His laugh is another thing I really miss - he had the cutest laugh when he was really "tickled" about something. I could go on about the things I miss about him, but I'm sure all of you are feeling the same way. HUGS to all of you!!! Patti

Thanks everyone! I am doing OK. I miss and love him very much, but as all of you know..life goes on. We have no choice but to continue on with our lives as best we can. I still have a job,a roof over my head, my family and friends so I'm thinking things are OK. My sister will be here for Thanksgiving - she lost her significant other almost 2 years ago, so she and I have a very special bond. She's 7 years older than me, but we have grown quite close in the last couple of years. She has never met my grandchildren or my in laws and she hasn't seen my daughter in about 15 years, so that will be exciting!! Things are OK..... Hugs to all. Patti