KatieC

NYDOC - I understand completely. I'm on 25 and my father passed away on March 24. It has been a rough couple of months and I'm sure it will continue to be rough but by leaning on my support systems, I have been able to continue living. I have not moved on and probably will never get over the death of my dad but I will live my life for him. I know that's what he would have wanted. With that and the support from family and friends, I've been able to go back to school and work. I think about him constantly but I have noticed that I don't necessarily think about his passing. I think of the good times we shared and the many memories I have of him. There are nights where I am reminded but they lessen with time. I know it's hard. Just know you are not alone and do not have to go through this alone. Along with this wonderful group, I'm sure you have support around you to lean on in those times of need.

After my father passed away, I seemed to be coping with it better than my mom and brother. But a part of me thinks it was only a facade. I lost all motivation. I began worse eating habits, which has resulted in weight gain. I seem to have sudden anger and sudden moments of crying. It's strange. I'm a very happy and optimistic person. I will be completely fine all day but when my mom refuses to buy parchment paper, I blow up. Or when my boyfriend and I are having a disagreement, I put it on my mom. I'm sure part of this is normal but I was wondering if anyone had any thoughts on how to help? With the sudden bursts of emotion, having absolutely no motivation and eating my feelings. I mean I am sitting right now and eating M&M's when I've already had lunch and I'm really not hungry. I have so many emotions and still am in disbelief over his passing that I don't know what to do or think. I know I have to move on but it is all so different now. So, any suggestions or advice for these things that I have mentioned?

Today is my parent's 28th anniversary. Unfortunately, my dad passed away 3 months ago unexpectedly at a very young age. I have mixed feelings about the day. My heart goes out to my mother. I want to fix her pain but I know I can't. I decided to surprise her this morning when she woke up to an anniversary card and some flowers. My dad wasn't a flower-giving person so I wasn't trying to fill the void but rather brighten this day for her. She went to the graveside. She even brought our dog. She then went on a hike. All alone. I know that she needs that but it is hard to let her be alone. It's hard to let her hurt. But I know I can't fill the void that his passing has left. But today is hard for me. I can't even imagine being her. Since she is all alone in the house for a couple days, including today, I set her all up. I have romantic movies, comedic movies, junk food, etc. to take advantage of. Just hoping this gets easier.

I completely understand what you mean. I lost my father about 3 months ago and I have since lost all motivation. My boyfriend has noticed and even commented on it. My mother went back to work and has forced motivation but it just didn't seem like I could do it. For me though, it has been a silent struggle. Recently, in the last week, I've forced myself to look at my books and read the chapters and do the assignments ON TIME. That hasn't happened since the accident. I know it's hard to hear, it was for me, but forcing a bit of motivation can really help. Don't get me wrong it's hard for me still and I have nights that I have no motivation still but I force it. After about a week, I feel much better. I'm still struggling though. The nice thing about being in college? Free counseling. I know that my dad wouldn't want me to drop out of school but I know I'm not mentally ready so I'm hoping the counselor will help. That may be something that you can look into through your school. I've also found when you're really not ready to do exams, by talking to your professors and expressing that, they listen and want to help in any way possible. It may be worth a shot. Maybe even think through scenarios that could occur while having those conversations that way you can be prepared and not anxious over it all. I wish you all the best and hope that you make the right decision for you.

I am 25 years old and in March 2016 my world came to a crashing stop. Literally. My dad, who was 57 years old, was traveling to work, in Amish country, and got into a car accident and died. The last 2 months have been a whirlwind of things going on. My mom is only 46. I have a younger brother at 22. My dad was the bread winner of the family. With his passing, there has been a lot of change that has to occur. We haven't paid off our house so now we have to move because we cannot afford it. We have to watch our money, which I'm not use to. I worked 2 jobs and go to school full time. I use to be a work/school-a-holic. Now I have motivation for nothing. Nothing but helping my mom and fixing the house to sell. People tell me that I have to start living my life not my mom's or the houses but it is easier said than done. One little thing sends me into a tear fest. So I have to participate in an online support group for school and thought this could be beneficial for not only myself but my schooling. This is my first time ever participating in anything like this and I'm very nervous and am scared with what emotions and such will come out of it.