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adelina

Members
  • Content Count

    3
  • Joined

  • Last visited

About adelina

  • Rank
    New Visitor

Previous Fields

  • Your relationship to the individual who died
    multiple losses
  • Date of Death
    between 20 Nov 2016 and 5 Jan 2017
  • Name/Location of Hospice if they were involved:
    Shrewsbury

Profile Information

  • Your gender
    Female
  • Location (city, state)
    Shrewsbury
  1. kayc, thank you for being so kind and supportive - I don't know you but I truly am grateful for your encouragement. God bless you and your journey too.
  2. Thank you so much Marty - I am utterly speechless that someone, literally a stranger, would care enough to reply with such compassion and wisdom. This is such a powerful act of compassion that I have not come across - I am calling a local charity for grief counselling today because I do want to do it properly now that I know I have to face it called grief. Thank you once again for everything. God bless you and this ministry.
  3. Can someone help please? I am confused. 20 Nov 2016 I lost a student of mine to death under influence of substance (he jumped out of a hotel window hallucinated and imaging he could fly after a wild party). I broke news to his parents abroad and with the school chaplain, pretty much took his memorial service first on 27 Nov, and then funeral on 7th Dec. The same evening as I returned from his funeral, totally depleted physically and emotionally, my husband broke news of my friend's unexpected death the day before, 6 Dec, due to a heart condition, aged 56. She was the only one I confided in about the student's funeral a few days prior to the funeral. A date was finally set for her funeral on 7 Jan 2017. Late afternoon on 5 Jan, I received a phone call from family members that my half brother (somebody very special and meant a lot to me,in my oriental culture, he was always my brother as there is no word for 'half brother' in my language) had passed away earlier that afternoon, and in a follow-up phone communication I was told that his cremation would actually take place on the same day as my friend's (a very swift development apparently common practice in Spain). I attended my friend's funeral in the end, as I could not get any air ticket to fly out within such a short space of time. I cried at my friend's funeral, remembering the circumstances under which I was told of her death, also agonising for the fact that another funeral was taking place at the same time,of which I should have but could not be part of. I eventually made my way to be with family on 21 Jan for a few days. A friend of mine said to me last Sunday, '... it's still early days, especially for such extraordinary multiple losses...' after learning that I had not taken any time off since it all happened last November and that I had little support and no counselling. But I thought I have been coping at work and I should be able to carry on functioning at work, because all this will fade and it's better to let it fade, isn't it? I am very confused with my approach with the multiple losses ( a term I only learned two days ago online) because I believed that it would work, but my friend was concerned as more and more tears streamed down my face as the conversation deepened and emotions seemed intensified. But I thought everything was fading... Nevertheless I have been reading stuff about grief and losses for the first time since Sunday and that's how I came across this forum. Can someone tell me if I am doing it right to let it fade and carry on as I have been for the past weeks? Should I be seeking professional help?
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