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gdragon33

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Previous Fields

  • Your relationship to the individual who died
    husband
  • Date of Death
    06/06/2015
  • Name/Location of Hospice if they were involved:
    NA

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  • Your gender
    Male
  • Location (city, state)
    zephyrhills, fl

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  1. yes a lot of prayer and studying the bible too just starting going through it from beginning reading 5 or so chapters every day
  2. there are times ill just sit and play all sara's favorite music just to sit and hear it and sometimes its almost like she is right there listening with me. her favorite radio station was JoyFM it used to drive me nuts how much she would wanna listen to it i grew up on country music and would change the station on her a lot but now theres nothing i wanna listen to more crazy the way that works sometimes
  3. thank you. yes its hard i for the most part last 2 years have done my best to block it out but when it hits it hits hard
  4. thank you everyone it is heartwarming really to see others going through similar things and shows im not alone even though at times it feels so
  5. thank you Kayc its true alcohol is a depressant. step daughter lives in another state and we have a hard time even getting to talk to her though recently we all got to talk to her on a video call on facebook so that was nice
  6. last night i found myself reading through old emails it was bittersweet. my 10 year old daughter really is having a hard time also always crying and being depressed lashing out in anger at everyone. my son who is 7 he never even talks about her but i know he must be hurting deep inside i just dont know how to reach him to help.
  7. thank you both of you. there are times i break down in front of the kids but i try my best not to. but i guess youre right every once in a while it is needed. far better than to be keeping everything bottled up. I really dont like to talk about everything but lately i see the need to have a place to vent. and this place seems as good as any atleast with people who also are going through the same things. sorry for your losses as well. what makes it really hard going through all this anxiety was that my wife was the one i always went to when i was feeling anxious and i could talk to her about everything best friend soulmate wife. but you are right we need to be there now for our kids more than ever. Numb and lost i hope the xanax work well for you and you continue to get better. Herc thank you for your wishes
  8. i am a 35 year old male father of two with a stepdaughter so really father of three though one not biological. my wife passed away in June of 2015. first couple of weeks it hit me extremely hard crying depression. I turned to my christian friends on facebook for support. stayed with my mother and stepdad for about a month. went got a job briefly though in reality it was too far away to travel back and forth. anyway after a month i got back on my own and moved my 2 kids..they took my stepdaughter away from us cuz she wasnt legally mine. so in one day we went from a family of 5 to a family of 3 two losses at once. when i moved back on my own i got increasingly more addicted to electronic outlets as i really have never been much of a people person. my wife was my best friend and soulmate we went through everything together and she knew me like no one else did. after august of 2015 i just started to block everything out never wanted to be crying around the kids always felt the need to be strong. after a while i started drinking..too heavily. and just this last month i developed anxiety attacks. and now my blood pressure is high or borderline high but my heartbeat has been going over 120 beats per minute at rest. its hard to sleep hard to do anything. and now i find myself missing sara more than ever because she was the one person in the world who could always calm me down. anyway this is me this is my story.
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