My husband of 36 years has advanced vascular (agitated) dementia; I see him every day at the skilled nursing facility where he lives. He knows me completely, but he doesn't not know much else (such as where he is or why). He is still very devoted and loving, but as a professor, father-figure, and a mentor to many family members and students over the years, I've noticed that at least half of them have disappeared since his decline - people I thought were family. Fortunately I do have some good friends, but I felt lonely so I called a local church about joining a grief group; they said I couldn't come because my husband was still alive. I understood, but did see something darkly funny about being rejected from a grief group! I thought of writing an essay about this "Good Grief: Rejected by a Grief Group."
