Sydneem

I agree with Kay! I feel like that is normal. I lost my boyfriend 8 months ago and I still can't do groups of people. I go into a deep spiral after any gatherings. I have learned to accept my grief and feel through it. Kay is right.. do what you need to do. There are days where I can't and don't want to do anything. I have learned that pushing myself only puts me further back in my healing process.

Hey there! My name is Sydnee. I lost my boyfriend 8 months ago today. This process is difficult and sometimes very dark. Support and counseling is how I have made it through so far. These forums may help a lot, there are also facebook pages you can join. Please reach out, you don't have to do this alone. I recently started a non-profit organization called Friends Through Grief Foundation. We have a social network to help connect people who have lost there partners. There aren't many users yet, but maybe some one there can help? Everyone in this forum seems very understanding and helpful. Continue reaching out. I am so sorry for your loss.

Hey all! I am on the same page. Aches and pains. Our bodies react to emotional pain almost the same as it does physical pain. Self-care isn't so easy anymore and sometimes being strong is impossible. Try to rest and heal <3 -Sydnee

It has been 8 months today since I lost my love, Kyle. No one has mentioned Kyle's name today except for me and his mother. How is this possible? How does my family not know how much pain I am in? This seems unbearable at times. I feel as though I go in and out of all of the grief stages in one day. I know he is not here physically, but to me he still is. I lost my best friend, my future, and the love of my life. Sometimes I feel like all people can compare my loss to is a break-up or a divorce. Does anyone feel this way? I understand that no one around me know what it is like to lose the love of your life.... which makes me feel even more alone... and I thought that wasn't possible. No one knows what to say, but I really just want them to ask me about him or share a memory. I want to hear his name out loud. I try to hold my head up for Kyle. I know that's what he would want me to do, but this is so difficult. I am constantly reminded of his death, memories, our planned future, flashback of finding him, etc. When people compliment my new house I can't help but think, "well it's not me and Kyle's house anymore so who cares." Nothing is the same without him. The world seems gray. I know I have the rest of my life, but most of the time I don't want it... not without him. Having the rest of my life will never take this pain away. I find myself constantly zoning out when people are talking to me... As if they even notice. People are so caught up in their lives. I feel as though I'm suffering alone in the world around me. Sorry there wasn't much positive content in this post, today has been one of those days.