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kris4956

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About kris4956

  • Rank
    New Visitor

Profile Information

  • Your gender
    Male
  • Location (city, state)
    DENHAM SPRINGS

Previous Fields

  • Your relationship to the individual who died
    CA
  • Date of Death
    12/19/2018
  • Name/Location of Hospice if they were involved:
    NA

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  1. kris4956

    The Guilt

    I'm sorry for your loss. So very sorry. I'm crying reading your story. I'm a 6'2", 270lb guy. I'm the tough cookie in our family. I was more at peace with my father passing away than I am with losing Sadie. We knew for a long time that my dad was very ill. Like your loss, it just happened. One day there, the next day gone. Out of my 3 dogs, she was the only howler. I could start howling, and she would join is. Thank God for the mobile phone. I have hundreds of pictures and videos of her.
  2. kris4956

    The Guilt

    My wife and I lost the first pet that we had gotten together as a couple in 2006. She hand picked our Sadie from a litter of newly weaned Bijons. She quickly became our baby, and over the years, became my wife's companion. OMG she was a yapper. Nobody would be able to get close to our home without Sadie hearing them and stayed vocal until she found out who it was. In 2011, I broke my back and began a life staying home. We had 3 dogs and with my being home all the time, forged a unique friendship with each one. I was so heavily sedated at night, there was times when i would wonder if i would wake up the next day. So began what would become a morning time ritual of snuggling each dog and thanking God for giving us a new day. We have been blessed to have 3 healthy dogs. In the 12 years we had Sadie, she was never sick. Monday of this week, she was fine. Tuesday night, she started acting different. Very early Wednesday morning, she was panting rapidly, like she was in pain. Our vet opened at 8am. It was only a 20 minute ride to the vet. My wife and I were talking about ways to make her more comfortable when we got back home. She never made it to the vet. She passed away in my wife's arms. My wife told me, she has stopped breathing. I grabbed Sadie's head just in time for her to see me before her eye's rolled. We've cried and cried. I've looked at my Nest Cam videos, just looking for something I missed. What did I miss? How did she go downhill so rapidly? The vet says she died of congestive heart failure. I know time heals all wounds. I know tomorrow will be better. I know I have 2 other dogs who need me to hold it together and not scare them. I'm just consumed with guilt. Thanks for listening.
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