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Grief Healing Discussion Groups

Jelo

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Previous Fields

  • Your relationship to the individual who died
    CA
  • Date of Death
    Dec 22,2018
  • Name/Location of Hospice if they were involved:
    NA

Profile Information

  • Your gender
    Female
  • Location (city, state)
    Anchorage,AK

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  1. Thank you! I admire you for doing that. I can’t even open my facebook & photo library from my phone as I breakdown everytime I see his pictures & videos.By the way, would you know of any legal public assistance I can get? I already reported this to the animal control & they’re doing tgeir own investigation & the most do is to add that incident on the boarding facilities’ public records. I want to seek legal actions but after talking to this lawyer, I was told my baby is just considered a “property” & legal fees are high 😞😭
  2. Thank you!Can you please cite concrete examples of ways you did or went through to help you go through the process? Most of the time, I’m lost, staring blankly at nowhere & just don’t know what to do then I would cry umcontrollably & that paralyzes me for the rest of the day...
  3. We’eevwaiting for his ashes anytime this week.I’m dreading that moment.. that call!I know I’ll be back from scratch.There are less & shorter crying times now.The family room & garage are trigger areas as those are his areas.His scent lingers.We’re thinking of changing the sofa & carpet, the house layout so it’ll be “easier” to avoid the triggers.I don’t know if this is the right move now.No luck in finding a new baby yet. We terrbily miss our routines & everytime we come home we break down as no one is welcoming us anymore.The silence in the house is killing us so we leave the radio on. We still talk to him & few of his favorite things we left visible in the family room. I don’t kjow if doing this is making things worse- maybe we should hide them with the rest of his things??? I don’t know.Last night I cried myself to sleep.Husband is silently grieving unlike me.We’re still broken & seems this will lasts forever. Thank you for your time & advice.
  4. Thank you so much!!!Yes, we’re looking for one now.We need someone to receive the love & time we have.The silence & emptiness at home is killing us.We haven’t been back to wrk yet & we’re planning to be back nxt week & I’m so scared to go on the “normal routine and schedule” without my baby. His ashes will be home anytime & that’s another big fear I have.I don’t know how I’ll take that moment. I almost passed out when I found out his death & hysterical from day 1.I’m dreading that day! I know all negative emotions I had from day 1 will come back, maybe worse & then I’ll go through the same ordeal & scared that I’ll be worse tgan today.We want one right away.I know I’m rushing. I’m guilty of looking for a clone & hubby just wants the same breed & male pup about the same age( 2 mos) when we got our 1st baby. Been searching for sites in our state for male pup shih tzus.We both want one asap.
  5. Thank you,Kayc!I appreciate everything you said.You read my mind, heart, & soul. This has helped me a lot.I will do my best to follow all those tips/advices. Me & husband are in the process of looking fir a new baby- we want exactly like him- We don’t know if this is a good decision- to get one right away or to look for one exactly like him.We read a few articles to not do any of this.What do you guys think? My sister also has a shihtzu -whom my baby hates so much bec he is the jealous type & he doesn’t want any other in the house but him. Our baby is very protective of us & everytime we bring my sidter’s puppy in the house, he acts weird & obviously he doesn’t like him in the house. We borrowed him one night on Christnas Eve just so we can fill in the emptiness of the house & our feelings.It wasn’t 100% happiness - I kept camparing him to our baby; There was huge guilt while holding him; I was constantly apologizing to my bany for caring for the pup; I was crying on & off the whole time the puppy was with us... I had mixed unexplained emotions.I don’t know if it was a good decision. Hubby is thinking of borrowing the puppy again & sister was offering her puppy if we feel the need to have him for sometime.What do guys you think?Thank you all for your time & advice!
  6. Thank you Marty!I don’t know how to function & move around at home.Non stop crying when I’m home.I see him in all areas of the house.He is the king in the house.He owns it.We kept his things in 2 huge boxes- that’s how much things he has for such a small puppy - 17 lbs shihtzu.Please, anybtips and advice on hiw to cope with daily life esp when were home is much appreciated!
  7. My baby of 8 yrs whom We spolied and loved more than ourselves was attacked & killed by another dog while boarding in a kennel facility while me & hubby were on vacation.We have no kids and he is our life!There is a huge guilt on our part.What if we didn’t leave him, what if we didn’t go on vacation, all sorts of “what if.”We’re so broken that we both can’t sleep sincecwe found out (12.22.18).We cry ourselves to sleep & wake up crying.We skipped the Christmas celebratiom as we’re both on bed and miserable.I myself can’t & won’t do anything.We haven’t gone back to work.I’ve been so depressed & can’t forgive myself!I’m still grieving for the death of my dear dad in Aug.And now this.. I can’t handle all the pain!So much emotions overwhelmed me.I don’t want to leave my bed as I can’t stand seeing the rest of the house especially our family room where he stayed for 8 yrs.We have our daily routine that haunts me every second.Please I need advice & help! Thanks!
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