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Grief Healing Discussion Groups

opaleyes

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  • Your relationship to the individual who died
    husband
  • Date of Death
    05/09/2019
  • Name/Location of Hospice if they were involved:
    na

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  • Your gender
    Male
  • Location (city, state)
    Inverness Fl.

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  1. 20 years married to the love of my life. I owe her everything. Nowhere start we met at a rock show not rock music but rocks minerals crystals I was selling and she was a patron across the way I saw her tots her hair over shoulder head flipped back I said to myself my God I hope she stops at my booth 30 minutes later she did and we hit it I fell in love from a hundred feet away when a woman tossed her hair over shoulder we were together 23 years total there was a four-month stretch we broke up my own stupid fault and after four months I couldn't stand it any longer you got back with her I beged her take me back and she did. We were married the following year at a rock show in spruce pine North Carolina July 28th. Things were beautiful for a while in about 2004 she started getting sick and it didn't get any better hashimoto's thyroiditis diabetes end problems with her systems. And this beautiful woman that I owe everything to and for starting to get sick by 2014 I'm now her caregiver live careers as artists began to suffer but I still saw the woman so sick is the beautiful woman that I fell in love with things progressed and got worse on the 4th of April I took her to the hospital and after fighting for 45 days ask the doctor disconnector I know this is going to sound really crazy and I was so guilty in the beginning but now thinking about it I realized something it was her time when we disconnected her it took 6 minutes my beautiful wife was sleeping peacefully without pain without hurt just sleeping peacefully I kissed you the last time and brought the doctors in it finally was over at least you were feeling no pain now now mine begins I thought that we had done okay and I thought that I had steeled myself against what I knew was going to happen but there can be no stealing yourself against this against the total utter emptiness it fills my chest that sucks the color from sunlight and it doesn't allow me to sleep or rest comfortable and I know I have to turn this around I know that my job isn't done yet I'm supposed to do one more thing and help somebody somehow I'm trying to be strong for you I'm trying to do what is right I need to find out how to empty this pain and I know I can't I also know but yes there is a way anyone has any info on how to slow it down how to ease it please in park because I need to keep on living not just in the past but in the future 2 there is something I have yet to do I once heard someone say that there is a simple test to determine whether or not your purpose in life has been fulfilled if you're here it hasn't I guess her purpose have been fulfilled and maybe that was to save me for something else.
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