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Nyanga B.

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Everything posted by Nyanga B.

  1. Hi, I just lost my dog and it really hurts, My long-time loyal pal and cuddle-buddy. Nobody gets how painful it is, No support from friends and family Everyone’s thinking “It’s just a dog… why make such a fuss?” They don’t get me! A few weeks ago, I woke up one morning and discovered a humongous golf-ball-sized lump on my dog - Kingpin. Of course, I ran to receive care from google and everything I found online was promising and reassuring. I went to the vet in the morning, they aspirated the lump, and then I waited. It would be fine, I figured. It always is. Besides, Google said so and we all know everything on the Internet is true. LOL! Then the vet called and all of a sudden my calm shattered . . . cancer! Long-short, the lump was removed and I got a voicemail from the vet - it was a hemangiopericytoma Well, that was more like good-bad news. You know, the best-case-cancer-scenario. The whole tumor was removed with clean margins and this type of cancer has a low rate of recurrence (as i was told) No need for puppy chemo or radiation or tough treatment decisions. What a sigh of relief…. Then the worst happened - some days later Kingpin died in his sleep. I have no clue how or why that happened I wish i could do an autopsy or something Honestly, that has been the most shocking, unexpected and painful thing that has ever happened to me I can’t concentrate at work and it is harder because my boss wouldn’t get why losing my dog is such a big deal - he isn’t such a pet lover after all. A huge part of me feel really guilty - like there is something more I should have done This time, Google doesn’t seem to have the help I need - at all! Blog posts and articles here and there, giving me tips and hacks to process my grief that don’t seem to work at all. In fact, it is so painful that I can't even follow the so-called steps to help me cope with my grief. I wanted help - real help. Somebody? Anybody...
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