Laura C

Oh Norma! I hope that all of the resources and words of love help you. Sending you so much love as you heal. When you feel the sadness and grief, feel it and respect it.

My 10 year old German Shepherd Juno died on 10-11-19 and life just hasn't been the same for me. I am also dealing with my youngest daughter leaving for college (she moved on 9-21, then the dog passed on 10-11) and feeling so lonely and useless!! Sometimes I can't determine if my grief is from the dog dying or the empty nest or BOTH!!!!! I am a nurse, currently home on a medical leave after shoulder surgery. The house is quiet and sad all day...I try to stay busy but find I am crying, sitting, and over eating. This is increasing my feelings of emptiness!!!! I go back to work on 11-25, so I know that will be helpful to me. I am mostly just needing to share and unload about my grief. I miss her so much it hurts. I feel like I let her down. She had been completely healthy, one day she stopped eating and the second day her back legs gave out. We rushed her to the vet and they found a tumor on her spleen and fluid in her abdomen. We rushed her to the nearest Emergency Vet Medical center where they diagnosed her with Hemangiosarcoma, a ruptured splenic tumor, and abdominal bleeding. They said that surgery would probably get us another month with her and so we decided to put her to sleep. I question our decision daily, and can't get the picture out of my head of her laying on the floor in the exam room with her belly distended, bleeding internally. She could only lift her head and then lay it back down...we asked her to help us make a decision and she made the weirdest crying, growling sound...I am pretty sure she was telling us it was time for her to go. I still can't stop seeing her there....dear lord...so darn sad...I just wish I could still have her here with me. It will be four weeks this Friday. My husband really, really wants to start looking for another pup. He misses her so much too. Thank you for reading/sharing with me.

Your words echo my feelings...my German Shepherd died 3 weeks ago and I am struggling so much! I am also journaling. The only thing that is helping me is watching two different series...."Born This Way" and "Good Witch" on Netflix!!! I know it sounds silly, but for some reason when I can't bear the pain, I put these on (even if I'm doing chores) and there is something so comforting about both of these "feel good" shows that help me move on. Try to find something that you like. I pray that we all find some relief from the pain soon!

Dearest Norma...what a beautiful boy Benjamin is! I am so deeply sorry for the loss of your precious babies. I am a Labor and Delivery nurse and have worked with a lot of families who have experienced loss. Your loss touches me deeply. May I recommend another book? Navigating the Unknown by Amie Lands is a really good resource for grieving parents. I am so glad you are getting counseling. Don't EVER think that you need to "move on" or "get on with life" because those babies ARE a part of your life. Many blessings of love, peace and comfort.

I am so very sorry for your loss. This is so difficult. Please know that it's ok to feel this way. I know right now, nothing makes sense, the world doesn't make sense without her. It may not for a while. Please remember you aren't alone in your grief. It's ok to cry and mourn and the people who truly understand will be there to support you. Sending you peace and light....