My 10 year old German Shepherd Juno died on 10-11-19 and life just hasn't been the same for me. I am also dealing with my youngest daughter leaving for college (she moved on 9-21, then the dog passed on 10-11) and feeling so lonely and useless!! Sometimes I can't determine if my grief is from the dog dying or the empty nest or BOTH!!!!!
I am a nurse, currently home on a medical leave after shoulder surgery. The house is quiet and sad all day...I try to stay busy but find I am crying, sitting, and over eating. This is increasing my feelings of emptiness!!!! I go back to work on 11-25, so I know that will be helpful to me. I am mostly just needing to share and unload about my grief.
I miss her so much it hurts. I feel like I let her down. She had been completely healthy, one day she stopped eating and the second day her back legs gave out. We rushed her to the vet and they found a tumor on her spleen and fluid in her abdomen. We rushed her to the nearest Emergency Vet Medical center where they diagnosed her with Hemangiosarcoma, a ruptured splenic tumor, and abdominal bleeding. They said that surgery would probably get us another month with her and so we decided to put her to sleep. I question our decision daily, and can't get the picture out of my head of her laying on the floor in the exam room with her belly distended, bleeding internally. She could only lift her head and then lay it back down...we asked her to help us make a decision and she made the weirdest crying, growling sound...I am pretty sure she was telling us it was time for her to go. I still can't stop seeing her there....dear lord...so darn sad...I just wish I could still have her here with me.
It will be four weeks this Friday. My husband really, really wants to start looking for another pup. He misses her so much too. Thank you for reading/sharing with me.