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Grief Healing Discussion Groups

Mark94

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  • Posts

    3
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Previous Fields

  • Your relationship to the individual who died
    Mother of SO
  • Date of Death
    13/12/19
  • Name/Location of Hospice if they were involved:
    NA

Profile Information

  • Your gender
    Male
  • Location (city, state)
    Blackpool, UK

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  1. Thank you so much for replying! I’ve read a lot of the posts here and I too see a pattern. It’s just hit me from nowhere because we were together for the week after her mum died and she kept saying how much she appreciates me and is looking forward to our future together. I understand completely that this is just how she is feeling but it’s just been a difficult couple of weeks. After the death she said she wanted me at the funeral and even called our boss to book it off for me, and then two days later she said she needs to take a step back. The funeral is next week and I haven’t heard from her for a week, so I’m thinking that I won’t go because I now don’t think it’s appropriate? It’s just a difficult time. We started talking because she was adamant to see me after a night out with friends (I left my car near to hers so she wanted to come and get me in the morning to take me to it) she’s said since that was a signal that I was oblivious too, stupid I know... She started messaging me a lot and I gladly responded because I’d liked her for a while and before I could tell her that, she said she’d liked me since we first met. She’s told me countless times how happy she is with me and that she’s excited. She came to see me when she was meant to be with her friends, which I didn’t initiate. I thought we were going really well and our mutual friends were happy for both of us, she told her girlfriends about me and she told me they all approve; one even said to me that I am the perfect guy for her and that the girl in question couldn’t stop talking about me. I kind of just feel like the rug has been swept from under me and I just hope that we can work it out - we see each other every week with work so I’ll see what happens there. As far as I know, our mutual friends still think we’re together so that could be interesting when we get back. I’m not really thinking this other guy is an interest for her because she’s said herself she’s not ready for anything serious and her head is all over the place.
  2. Hello. I am currently in a difficult situation and I don’t really know what to do. Me and a girl have been together for a couple of months and we were going really well, she told me she was very happy and excited about where the relationship was going. A few weeks in she told me that her mum had stage 4 cancer and I told her that I will be there whenever she wants to talk about it and that it won’t put me off at all. Her mum died a couple of weeks ago and she was distraught and I did everything I could to help her. She was very appreciative of this but I just saw it as doing what I thought was right. A week later she messaged me saying that she feels she needs to take a step back from us because she’s not ready for anything serious and her head’s all over the place, which I do really understand, and I am now giving her space. However, a mutual friend has told me she is messaging another guy and I’m now feeling quite anxious. I know this is not about me and I really just want her to be ok and for our relationship to not be completely over. I guess I was taken aback that she went from saying she’s super happy and excited, to saying she needs to take a step back within a few days. Any thoughts will be really appreciated!
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