About a year and a half ago, i lost one out of the three, most important persons in my life! My grandmother! She's wasn't just my grandma; she was basically my mother. She raised me from the day i was born, bcuz my mother was only 16, when she had me. My mom was out of control n just plain and simple, didn't want to be a mom and didn't want me period! She told me so herself, many times! Anyways, I was devastated, when my Gram passed and still am! Time doesn't heal anything, to me, time has only made it worse! I miss her more and more everyday! At the time that she passed, I was 40 going on 41 and literally the day of her wake, is the exact day, (i know for a fact) that i started early perimenopause. I woke up n my stomach, was extremely bloated! To the point i looked, about 7 months pregnant! Even my family members, who came to the wake, that i haven't seen in years! Came up to me and asked me, if i was pregnant. I didn't get my period, which i didn't think I would, bcuz i have never gotten that bloated, from pms ever! I chalked it up, to being extremely stressed out, sad, depressed n going through grief. I have never lost anyone that close to me before! So, I wasn't sure what ur body may physically go through, when ur grieving. Months passed and still no period! I was so caught up in my grief, that i honestly wasn't paying attention, to not getting my period. I'd say, about 4 months went by, before i suddenly realized i hadn't had it, in a long minute. So, then i thought i really was pregnant and took multiple pregnancy tests! All of them, came back negative! It never crossed my mind, not even once, that i could be starting perimenopause! Bcuz, I'm so young! A woman usually starts perimenopause, around the same time, their mother did. My mom didn't start it, till she was 51. Or, it can be bcuz u got ur period, at a young age, which i did not. I got it 2 days before, my 14th birthday, which is average for a girl. Then, i started getting really scared! I wasn't pregnant and perimenopause, never crossed my mind! I honestly didn't know much about it, to know that i was showing every sign and symptom, of it...mood swings, hot and cold flashes, no sex drive, weight gain etc. Like i said, i started getting scared! I was thinking something was seriously wrong, with me, like cancer or polyps. Then the fact that i literally had, absolutely no sex drive! I didn't even want to be touched, by my fiancelet alone sex! That alone started causing serious problems, in our relationship! He thought I was cheating on him and almost left me. That's when i finally thought, to seek medical help. I didn't want to lose my fiance! I love him with all my heart! He's one of the three, most important ppl in my life, that i mentioned earlier! My daughter being the first, my Gram, then him! Plus i needed him so much, at that time, bcuz of losing my Gram. So, I made the appointment, with a medical dr. They sent me, to the ob/gyn. And the ob/gyn ,did all kinds of tests and it came back, that I was definitely, starting perimenopause and i was definitely, really early! REALLY, REALLY EARLY!!! I know for a fact, that losing a loved one, who meant the world to u, can definitely, without a doubt in my mind, make u start early perimenopause! I just really hope the medical community, will do more research on this subject! So that more woman, don't have to go through the guessing game! The way I did!
