Tonight is one of the nights i will unfortunately never forget.We have a blue/white budgerigar,he was beautiful and its been two years since we met him.Unlike other birds he was way more friendly with us he knew we loved him and he was acting like it.He was the sweetest bird,he would repeat what we say,when we were kissing him he wee kissing us back with sounds and everything.Even when we(my family) had problems with each other he would always help us cheer up again.Its just that even though cats and dogs seem more like-human type of pets sometimes birds can be too.We had an amazing bond.Tonight,I got out of the bathroom and head back to my room.He always tried to be around me and chase me.I got into my room and as i was closing the door he tried to come in.It was like a 2-3 seconds later i realized his head was in between the door and the door trim.As soon as i realized i pulled the door to myself and he fell and didn't get up.I first thought he was injured until he closed his eyes and his heart didnt beat.I can maybe get over a pets death but knowing that i directly caused it (regardless of my intention was never to hurt him) makes me wish i died instead of him.Seeing him die was so hard for me.Thinking how eveything could be different makes me feel guiltier.I have read this blog and seeing im not the only one is ok but i unfortunately cant be ok.Sorry i thought maybe writing helps.The only thing that could help would be turning back time.He loved me so much and i caused his death.Will never forgive myself.Thanks for the supportive things tho this wasnt one.
