I am having a hard time moving on from the loss of my dog. He was 15 years old and I put him to sleep. He was experiencing health problems such as seizures and blindness. I always wonder if there is a chance that he could have healed, and I often have dreams that my dog still had life in him. It's really hard to deal with the loss because I recognize now that I should have waited a little longer before putting him to sleep.
What has made it even harder to move on is that my family is not at all understanding of my grief. They buried my dog with his leash and collar, so I didn't get to keep any remembrance of him. Even more, they don't remember where they buried the dog. It would give me so much peace just to sit by his grave and say goodbye, and maybe even say a few prayers. But I can't do that because my parents won't let me even mention the dog without getting defensive and act really weird and closed off. It's really bothering me because they are shoving him to the side and ignoring the fact that he was a huge part of the family.
I haven't been able to grieve or properly get any closure. It's a very horrible feeling, like I am powerless and my family has stripped away every memory of my dog and has shut my mouth to prevent me from remembering him. And stuffing their feelings deep down pretending like it doesn't hurt them at all. They are really hurting my feelings by doing this, and I keep telling them but they don't care. I am grasping to keep my memories of him alive, but every physical thing about him has been torn to shreds by my family. I have nothing and I am in a very hard space mentally. I cannot sleep, I have trouble focusing and getting work done throughout the day, and I don't have any friends to lean upon ( I just moved out of state ). I don't know what to do anymore