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Alie

Contributor
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    7
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About Alie

  • Rank
    New Visitor

Previous Fields

  • Your relationship to the individual who died
    Mom
  • Date of Death
    07/23/2020
  • Name/Location of Hospice if they were involved:
    Na

Profile Information

  • Your gender
    Female
  • Location (city, state)
    Serbia

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  1. @jc1030 I'm sorry for your loss. I'm also amazed by how many people went through the same heartwrenching experience of losing a mother to cancer... sharing our experiences allows us to think more objectively, which during grief can help a lot to deal with the pain. I empathize deeply with what you went through.. cancer is the worst, it's destructive and parasitic, it eats away at the person in both body and mind... and yes the deterioration can take just a few months, such in my case... I know exactly what you mean about your frustration and lack of patience. I loved my mother beyond des
  2. @Skillet I'm terribly sorry for your loss and understand your pain to the core of my being. What I've learned while talking to people about my own mom is that hiding illness is a very motherly thing to do, I dare say it's an instinct. They dont want to cause any pain to their children, and when it comes to more serious illnesses they also want to deny reality as much as possible so they retain a sense of normalcy.... Cancer is something that affects the whole family, and whose heavy treatment may cause even more suffering that can last years. Guilt is a very normal feeling in this situati
  3. @kaycThank you, you're very kind, talking to you and @MartyThelped clear up my clouded mind quite a bit. I love my mother so much I now realize that no matter what I did, in my eyes it would have never been enough... My last hurdle will be to be able to move past those intense memories of her pain seared into my mind. I relive them as if she is still going through that in limbo. At least I don't feel like I contributed to that pain anymore. I also wish you both peace in your lives, and if I may, also a lot of happiness... I haven't been able to talk about what I felt towards my mother's
  4. @MartyT Thank you for the wonderful articles. I'm relieved to know that the whirl of emotions I feel are also a part of grief. I couldn't thank you enough for offering me a bit of guidance now that my mentor is gone. I wish you a very pleasant week ❤
  5. @MartyTThank you so much , I'm overwhelmed by your kindness I actually had to cry a bit before I could respond. I will try my best to honor her memory and live my life for the two of us when I manage to get on my feet again. Right now I don't know what to do but I'm taking it day by day. The guilt I felt was eating me up from the inside... My mom was my world yet I felt like I never checked up on her as well as I should have. This forum allowed me to determine if I did enough for her, and it gave me some peace of mind. Thank you for the article, and for your comment, it means the w
  6. @kayc Thank you so much for your kindness... it does make sense that she was in denial because so were we... not once did we talk about death during all this ordeal. "Out of sight out of mind" was then her way of maneuvering her situation... she was a very good mom and im proud of her... It helps to know the opinion of someone who has gone through grief such as yourself and I value your comment dearly, especially after feeling alone in this. Most people I know, haven't gone through a loss like this so they don't know how to connect and neither do i since I'm not the same person anymore.
  7. Hello, I'm 25 years old and I lost my mom almost 2 months ago... I find myself unable to cope much less function since it happened so I wondered if anyone has some advice they could share with me... It's my first loss. My mom was my best friend, my mentor and the person I valued most. We shared everything, we had similar tastes, we confided in each other and we were both childlike, enjoying video games and cartoons together. She knew how to find pleasure in the little things in life but was also a big planner for the future. She was a very loving and generous person. We were absolutely in
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