I lost my beautiful Mom to cancer 4 months ago, she was diagnosed and 3 months later she was gone, she was only 48. I still cry everyday and sometimes I just can't beleive what has happened and I just want to wake up from this nightmare, feels like I'm in a Freddy Crueger movie or something. I can't beleive the emotions and thoughts that I am capable of, I could never have guessed before this happened. I have been through horrible anger, sadness, guilt and so many other feelings. Now four months later I still feel all these things but I am starting to see a little bit more clearly through the fog. My mom sacraficed so much to be my Mom and made sure that I had a wonderful childhood and a best friend as an adult, all she wanted for me was happiness and a wonderful life, so I have to go on and try for a happy life. It's not easy, I wish I could just slide under the covers and hide from this seemingly cruel world. Anyway those are my honest true feelings and I want you to know that I too have gone through serious fights and anger with relatives and so called friends. You really see a persons true being when they are faced with something like this. My Mom's sister has actually said to me and my sisters that we do not respect our Mother's memory. She is horrible, and has absoulutley no grounds to say these things. It was over material things passed down to us, she wants them for herself I think and is mad about that. Anyway you can't imagine someone especially your Mom's sister and best friend saying this to you. Well the anger has torn me apart but I've realized that my health is the most important thing and I'm afraid that if I let this anger and sadness eat at me, well I'm afraid that I will get sick. My Mom did not care about material things. My advise to you is to try to remember what was really important to your Mom. If your relatives choose to behave in a horrible way you can't control that, all you can control is how you feel and live the rest of your life. Well I certainly don't have all the answers but I just wanted you to know how I'm trying to get through things. Take care of yourself, cause your health is # 1.