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Grief Healing Discussion Groups

remembering

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  1. I'm having trouble figuring out how to navigate this reply button - well, thanks for your response, Paul. I wish I had found this kind of forum much earlier than this. I would have really benefitted from this. I still take everything one day at a time, as my life certainly has lots of ups and downs -and dealing with grief sort of slows down my normal responses to life sometimes. I have a feeling that whatever used to be normal has changed for me - like what I call grief is like going through a passage somewhere inside me, or a door that I walked through into some alien unknown territory and I'm never quite sure which way to turn. I know that the pain doesn't hurt quite so much any more. I cried a river of tears already. Mostly I still wonder why I am left behind - there's a part of me that still asks "why?" I read somewhere that a mother is always a vital part of her children in some way, even after she is gone. I remember my Mom telling me not to try to hold on to her after she was gone, but to be brave enough to let her go on to wherever she goes. My courage wavers but I think I'm still processing - and somewhere down deep inside me I feel something new stirring - I hope I give birth to it soon. Thanks, Deborah
  2. Thanks for the good advice Paul. The second pointer really hit home for me. I lost my mother 3 years ago, who was my best friend. I am 57, and she was 94 when she passed. I lost my older sister just 9 months before that, who was like a second mother to me, so I did a lot of grief work inside myself, and pushed myself to move through the grief. I felt like a shell of my former self for so long. I started to feel less pain of the loss and more "normal" for a while. Then, the anger and the missing of my Mom seemed to come back. I've been dealing with that lately - more memories seem to bring it up. What I'll remember is your mention of distinguishing between the pain and the person. That was what I needed to be inspired by right now. Just wanted to say thanks, Deborah
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